10 Most Dangerous Toys of All Time!

This list is hilarious! According to Radar Magazine these are the worst and most dangerous toys of all time, as defined by their ability to kill, maim and generally be hazardous to the well being of the children to which they were given.

Each toy is linked to the complete page on the Radar website that has a more complete description of the mayhem wreaked by the particular weapon toy.

Here goes then:

Power Wheels Motorcycle10.) Fisher-Price Power Wheels Motorcycle

Eager youngsters who gunned the throttle found that it often stayed gunned, stuck in a petrifying state of perma-acceleration. Presumably, the child on the motorcycle was then taken on a hellish, intestine-twisting scream ride.

Battlestar Launcher9.) Battlestar Galactica Missile Launcher

It takes just a few jabbed eyes, some torn intestines and the death of a child to bring down a party, and that’s just what happened in January 1979, when the battle cruiser missiles were finally recalled.

Johnny Reb Cannon8.) Johnny Reb Cannon

The Reb fired hard, plastic cannonballs with a spring mechanism—the aspiring secessionist need only pull a lanyard. No word on exactly how fast the cannonballs flew, but they traveled up to 35 feet and seemed perfectly sized to lodge into an eye socket, down an open mouth…

Creepy Crawlers7.) Creepy Crawlers

Nothing says safety like an open hot plate. And nothing says fun like using that open hot plate to create molten, rubbery insects you can throw at your sister while narrowly avoiding setting the house ablaze.

At least those who dodged serious injury or disfigurement could safely eat their creation. Oh wait, the critters were toxic, too.

Derringer Belt Gun6.) Bat Masterson Derringer Belt Gun

According to SafeKids USA, “Caps can be ignited by friction and cause serious burns.” Every young boy needs to learn the valuable lesson of always protecting his nether regions, with force if necessary, but given the positioning of the Derringer, the owner’s greatest enemy might have actually been puberty.

Sky Dancer5.) Sky Dancers

Injuries included scratched corneas and temporary blindness, mild concussions, broken ribs and teeth, and facial lacerations that required stitches. Nearly nine million Sky Dancers were eventually recalled, leaving aspiring ballerinas to earn their battle scars the old fashioned way, with an eating disorder.

Snack Time Cabbage Patch4.) Snacktime Cabbage Patch Dolls

With no mechanism to turn off the munching should trouble arise, it was only a matter of time before some cherub’s long blonde hair got caught in the doll’s rabid jaws. After 35 fingers and ponytails fell victim, the Snacktime Kids were removed from retail shelves forever, and 500,000 customers were offered a full $40 refund.

Mini 3.) Mini-Hammocks from EZ Sales

Unfortunately, children seeking to spend an afternoon like Gilligan became entangled in the net and strangled to death.

CPSC reported in August 1996 that the product had resulted in the fatal and near-fatal asphyxiation of dozens of kids ages five to 17 and recalled three million of them.

Radioactive Energy Lab2.) Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab

For a mere $49.50, the kit came complete with three “very low-level” radioactive sources, a Geiger-Mueller radiation counter, a Wilson Cloud Chamber (to see paths of alpha particles), a Spinthariscope (to see “live” radioactive disintegration), four samples of Uranium-bearing ores, and an Electroscope to measure radioactivity.

Lawn Darts1.) Lawn Darts!

During their brief (and generally awesome) reign in 1980s suburbia, Jarts racked up 6,700 injuries and four deaths.

Article Written by
John P.

John P. is CEO of Livid Lobster and co-host of Geek Beat TV. You can also find him on Twitter, Facebook and Google+.

Comments

  1. PaulC says:

    I blame the Spinthariscope for my cataracts! I had a spring dart gun as a kid that i could only load by putting dart on floor and puhsing gun down on it as hard as I could. I hadbtarget on front door and one day missed it and hit the small window pane on door. The dart went right through it and my parents took away my dart gun!
    Of course i still had my chemistry set complete with saltpeter, sulpher,charcoal,etc.,and my BB gun.

  2. Andoo says:

    I loved Evel Knievel on that motorcycle. It would tear your hand off if you tried to stop the wheel.

  3. John says:

    Does anyone remember the Evel Knievel wind up motorcycle? That was a bad one for me.

  4. luke pawelcwpy says:

    This is stupid,i mean really,a kid died from plastic missiles!

  5. Funny I am still alive….after my childhood born 1966….! :-)

  6. rosario says:

    I also don’t like the motorcycle, thanks for very valuable information :)

  7. Ally says:

    Sky dancers were recalled? My sisters and I still have some of those but we haven’t played with them in years.

  8. Russ says:

    Creepy Crawlers did actually “spawn” a version you could eat: Incredible Edibles. Pretty much the same setup but no heat and some kinda sugary stuff in a squeeze bottle you’d put in the the molds: http://www.samstoybox.com/toys/IncredibleEdibles.html

  9. julia nudeln says:

    i`m agree the motorcycle is very dangerous. My daughter and my son will never have it. they have so many funny toys, that they dont miss more dangerous.

  10. TimS says:

    What! No reference to lawn darts?! Or did I miss it? Lol

  11. baon says:

    Great article. You provide very valuable information.
    Thanks

  12. Awesome Man says:

    Better throw out my sister’s old Skydancers.

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