A doctor on his morning walk, noticed an older lady sitting on her front step smoking a cigar, so he walked up to her and said, “I couldn’t help but notice how happy you look! What is your secret?”
“I smoke ten cigars a day,” she said. “Before I go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint. Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food. On weekends, I pop pills, get laid, and don’t exercise at all.”
“That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?”
“Thirty-four,” she replied.
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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel coming out of his crotch area. The bartender points: “What is up with that?”
Pirate: “Arghh! It’s driving me nuts!”
Haha that is quite a funny joke, especially because the person asking is a doctor. I could of almost predicted the answer though, I think I heard a similar joke sometime before tehe… It was still a good one though.. I wonder though that must be a fat lady!
Good looking granny at 34 :) I guess the old Jack makes her so young…
This is so hilarious. I really thought smoking can give a long life, LOL but I was wrong.
LOL, basically just feel young and you will e right?
wow… reminds me of when I was in high school – we had a staff that watched out for kids misbehaving – she was only 40 but she looked like she was 80 – she was a heavy smoker and everyone called her “grandma.”
this is great joke and is not to far of the true, I have 22 years old, I smoke cigars and drinks a lot since I have 16 years old, thanks good that doesnt affect me to much as other persons because I also do a lot of exercise and eat healthy but with the time was causing me health problems I have 52 days of quick smoking and drinking like a viking and I can notice the different now I just drink occasionally and I am doing more excersise than before and believe me I feel better than ever now I have more capacity to breathe, more skills playing soccer more energy to lift weight and I so happy with God that open mi mind and put me to see clear that I was doing wrong remeber that he gave us this body to used correctly no to damage it, how do you feel? if you works hard to give someone a great gift and that person don’t even care about it and damage your gift and destroit by himselft without no conscience, well my friends God feels the same when we damage our body with tons of alcohol, with cigars, with drugs, etc….thing about it and take care a little bit more please I beg you guys in the name of God (note: I even go to church, so don’t think that I am giving to you a Religious talk this is only a guy that wants to help)
LOL, I haven’t read such a great joke for a while :)
Well being happy could make a very long life, if smoking make us happy why not ? many people who are heavy smoker had very long life …