YES! I blame the citizens! It is our own apathy that allows this to occur. Some decision maker somewhere is thinking about how to cover his ass and asking questions like:

• How fast can we get this job done? Because if it drags on and on, people are going to have my ass!
• How much is this going to cost? Because it it’s too much, people are going to have my ass!

It’s no wonder they choose a cheaper, faster workforce that is state-owned, who don’t pay workers very much, and without as much regard for their workforce’s safety! In every way the decision maker will be judged, it saves their ass!

Except one…

The citizens need to make it 100% clear in no uncertain terms that:

• They don’t care if it costs a little more.
• They don’t care if it takes a little longer.
• They are willing to do the work, and do it in a quality manner!

The economics are very simple, and by keeping these projects and jobs within our economy the money spent has a huge multiplier effect. On top of that, even if the US companies are slower and less efficient at the moment, after they complete one or two of these projects they’ll get more experience and be up to speed on the next ones!

The bottom line is, if you keep farming out our projects to people who might be better at them today, we’ll become entirely dependent on them, lose the skill set, and never be able to win one in the future!

The argument that we lack skilled workers is absolute crap! Even if that was the case all it takes is one special visa to allow them to come here from other countries and we’d solve it in about 1 week.

Does this piss you off as much as it does me?

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Fortunately, that all happened in slower speeds. However, a few weeks ago in West Virgina, this incident below happened on an interstate with much higher speeds and true zero visibility. In this case, the results for the driver of the camera fortunately were good, but not for the guy trying to stop right next to him:

Keep in mind, this was during just a brief snow squall. Those things can be exceptionally dangerous in that they are so brief and it usually clears up quickly after they pass.

But folks, this winter has been a bit on the unusual side when it comes to snowfall, especially in the Eastern Part Of The Unites States. The winter is NOT over yet! Please be careful out there!

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Google’s legal battle in support of their efforts to scan books and make them available through their Google Bookstore has been going on for years.

News about the conflict has been scarce of late while Google and the association of authors and publishers have tried to work out a settlement agreement.

The parties did come to an agreement back in 2008 that would have worked to their mutual advantage, but backlash against it convinced the judge presiding over the case to reject the settlement.

The latest development is a strong one; Google is now moving to have the Authors Guild removed from the proceedings on the grounds copyright infringement suits must be filed by the copyright holders. This should sound familiar to anyone who kept an eye on the trials and tribulations of Righthaven, the copyright troll who brought nothing but misery upon themselves in trying to bring infringement suits against various bloggers and websites when they didn’t own the copyright to the material they were suing over.

I have a personal sort of fascination with this case and have been keeping an eye on it since the story started up years ago. It has lately become even more important to me, as I’ve shifted my focus more and more towards writing full time myself.

My approach to copyright is vastly different than the one taken by the Authors Guild and individual artists suing Google. I’m a believer in the path taken by Cory Doctorow and Scott Sigler among others, that if you freely give your work away, it amounts to the best advertising you don’t have to buy and will, somewhat ironically, increase sales.

The Author’s Guild and individual artists are in a very different position than writers like I am in; they have something to lose. They’re invested in the old publishing and distribution model, and so they feel, rightly or wrongly, that Google’s scanning ways are a threat. It’ll be interesting to see how this all shakes out; Google is likely to make fair use claims before the end of the year, or early in 2013.

(via Ars Technica)

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…the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances…

Yesterday, police at UC Davis demonstrated that they don’t value that particular edict established by the people when they turned a can of riot control pepper spray on a peaceful group of students sitting on the ground. The entire event was captured on video and in photos.

The man responsible for the attack on these citizens is UC Davis Police Lt. John Pike.

Take a look:

Here is a second angle on that event:

As Xeni Jardin from BoingBoing put it:

In the video above, you see a police officer [Update: UC Davis Police Lt. John Pike] walk down a line of those young people seated quietly on the ground in an act of nonviolent civil disobedience, and spray them all with pepper spray at very close range. He is clearing a path for fellow officers to walk through and arrest more students, but it’s as if he’s dousing a row of bugs with insecticide.

What I find most egregious is that after spraying the students, the police still had to handcuff, arrest, and move them. None appeared to be resisting in any way, and I’m sure there are lawyers lining up to represent them in what is sure to be a huge wave of lawsuits.

Also of note, the UC Davis professor who helped organize the protest is calling for the resignation of the Chancellor of the University. In his words, here’s why:

Police used batons to try to push the students apart. Those they could separate, they arrested, kneeling on their bodies and pushing their heads into the ground. Those they could not separate, they pepper-sprayed directly in the face, holding these students as they did so. When students covered their eyes with their clothing, police forced open their mouths and pepper-sprayed down their throats. Several of these students were hospitalized. Others are seriously injured. One of them, forty-five minutes after being pepper-sprayed down his throat, was still coughing up blood.

I have no problem with the police doing their job. If they need to clear the path, they have the power to do so. But they forget that their power is derived from the people, and we want to see it executed judiciously. There is case law which suggests these actions were in no way appropriate.

Here is a significant Ninth Circuit case regarding the constitutionality of pepper spraying peaceful protesters:

HEADWATERS FOREST DEFENSE v. COUNTY OF HUMBOLDT:
Characterizing the protestors’ activities as “active resistance” is contrary to the facts of the case, viewing them, as we must, in the light most favorable to the protestors:  the protestors were sitting peacefully, were easily moved by the police, and did not threaten or harm the officers. In sum, it would be clear to a reasonable officer that it was excessive to use pepper spray against the nonviolent protestors under these circumstances.

Here is a California law directly related to deployment of this kind of weapon:

California Penal Code Section 12403.7 (a) (8)
(g) Any person who uses tear gas or tear gas weapons except in self-defense is guilty of a public offense and is punishable byimprisonment in a state prison for 16 months, or two or three years or in a county jail not to exceed one year or by a fine not to exceed one thousand dollars ($1,000), or by both the fine and imprisonment, except that, if the use is against a peace officer, as defined in Chapter 4.5 (commencing with Section 830) of Title 3 of Part 2, engaged in the performance of his or her official duties and the person committing the offense knows or reasonably should know that the victim is a peace officer, the offense is punishable by imprisonment in a state prison for 16 months or two or three years or by a fine of one thousand dollars ($1,000), or by both the fine and imprisonment.

Thanks to Steve Garfield for bringing this to my attention, and Louise Macabitas for the photo.

What do you think about this?

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What do you think? Do you have a better way of explaining it so that even your grandmother could understand what happened? If so, please share!

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Saving Man Under Burning Car

On Monday in Logan, Utah a motorcycle accident left one man laying underneath a car, with the motorcycle and front end of the car in flames. Witnesses to the accident quickly rushed forward to try to help, but clearly no one could save the man by themselves.

Here’s a description of what happened from the Salt Lake Tribune:

Timplen said he quickly pulled on a pair of gloves, and then witnesses said they watched him try single-handedly, but unsuccessfully, to lift the heavy car off Wright. Then two or three more people tried to help.

When Logan patrol Sgt. Jason Olsen pulled up, he saw the woman laying on her belly and Timplen and the few others trying to move the heavy car. Olsen said he went for a jack to try to prop the car up, but within 3 to 5 seconds, a dozen people materialized and worked together to push the car off Wright’s body. “I thought it was awesome,” Olsen said.

The accident happened right near Utah State University’s math department. “I heard screaming,” said Anvar Suyundikov, a graduate student from Uzbekistan studying statistics.

Another grad student in statistics, Abbass Sharif, of Lebanon, said his thoughts naturally drifted toward the injured man’s odds of surviving. “What are the chances of him living or dying,” Sharif said he thought. He believed death would be 100 percent certain if no one helped, but he’d have a chance of survival ­— albeit however small — if others helped.

The Video

What Happened Exactly?

Assistant Logan Police Chief Jeff Curtis said the accident occurred when the BMW, exiting a parking lot across the street from the Utah State University campus, drove in front of Wright’s bike. Wright and his bike then slid into and under the car. The bike caught fire when its gas line ruptured, and the flames spread to the BMW. The Highway Patrol continued to investigate the accident Tuesday afternoon, Curtis said.

Barney said the male driver of the BMW was “very emotional” and shaken by what had occurred. Curtis said Wright suffered broken bones, cuts and burns. The driver of the BMW was not injured. Police said alcohol and drugs were not a factor.

“I’m just very thankful for everyone that helped me out,” Wright told The Associated Press by telephone from his hospital bed. “They saved my life.”

Firefighters put out the flames and rushed Wright to the hospital by medical helicopter.

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Last Minute Changes – Out of Office on September 11

Madeleine and her 9-year-old daughter, Catherine were visiting the Philippines to see family,  in particular her father who was in an accident and broke numerous bones in his frail body. They left for the Philippines in June 2001 with plans to come back to New York before Labor Day, in time for Catherine to start school.  In late August, preparing to come home, Madeleine’s father had now become very ill and was again hospitalized.  Her father was sick and her daughter needed to get back to New York to start the school year. She was in a bind. What was she to do?  She decided it would be best to stay with her father and found a way for Catherine to do her missed school work and send it back via FAX.  She notified the airlines to change her flight, returning in mid to late September.

September 11, 2001 –  9:03 AM

At  9:03 AM United Airlines Flight 1175 crashes into the south tower of World Trade Center 2, which collapses at 9:59 AM.  Everyone vividly recalls where they were when they first saw the news on that tragic day. Madeleine was safe at her parents’ home. Her brother called and told her to watch CNN. Her first thoughts when she saw the towers collapse: “Oh my God, what happened to my co-workers?”.  She was lucky not to be in the office that day.  Had she not made changes to travel, she would have been on the 86th floor of World Trade Center 2.  She didn’t have office contact information and wasn’t able to communicate with anyone from her office.  It was a long tragic day for her and the rest of the world.  Lucky to be alive and wondering what could have been.

Father Hospitalized and Passes Away

She told her father news of the attack while he was in the hospital.  The hospital didn’t have a television and he wasn’t able to see the devastation.  He wasn’t feeling well, yet he was glad that she was safe with family. He understood his daughter could have been in that building. She was lucky to be alive, yet her father’s prognosis was not looking good. On September 25, 2001 her father passed away of natural causes.

Memories of Co-workers

Thirty-nine of her co-workers perished and only one body was found from their office. Search and rescue teams recovered the body of Chow Lam on the roof of the adjacent Deutsche Bank building. Mr. Lam’s office was located right next to a window. Reports indicate the impact from the second plane threw him from his office window and sent him falling to his demise on the roof of the Deutsche Bank Building. Mr. Lam’s wife felt fortunate, at least they had his body.  Other grieving families did not have a body nor complete closure.

Rose Riso was the fire warden of the floor and she took the responsibilities of the role seriously.  She saw the plane hit Tower 1. She had a keen sense and told her co-workers that smoke from the first tower would spread to Tower 2.  She told people to get out of the building. Some listened and some didn’t.  Little did they know Tower 2 would be attacked next. Numerous co-workers lives were saved because they listened to Rosie. Ms. Riso did not make it out of the building.

Return Home after September 11

Madeleine came home in early October and the world was changed.  All personal possessions left in her office were obviously gone. A very small price to pay, she was alive and well. She and co-workers that survived were never the same. The first three months after the attack were the most difficult. Work days were long and slow.  They would be at work yet their minds were somewhere else. One-on-one counseling was available to those in need. So many people had stories to tell.  So many brave men and women died and made tremendous sacrifices, and we will never know their story.  Many of her friends said her father saved her life. Madeleine’s father died and she was able to tell her story. 

Do you have a September 11 story to tell? We’d love to have you share it below.

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According to the lawsuit, among the 2,792 people killed in the twin towers, 31 were Muslim Americans, approximately 400 to 500 were Jewish Americans, approximately 500 were non-religious Americans, and an unknown number were Americans of other faiths. (So, about half of the people who died were not Christian.)

Additionally:

No other religious or non-religious group has been permitted a memorial.

Fox News had some discussions about this event including this one.

Fox News on the WTC Cross Lawsuit

Clearly Christians are angry. They later had Blair Scott, Communications Director for American Atheists, on a show to talk about the lawsuit and immediately the Fox News Facebook page was flooded with thousands of comments. I would link to the post, but apparently Fox removed it. Not before several comments were screen captured though.

Keep in mind, this blog post is not about whether or not the Cross or any other religious things should be allowed at the WTC Memorial, which incidentally is mostly funded with hundreds of millions of dollars of US taxpayer money from people of all religions, including non-religious people.

What it is about however is the swift, brutal and violently extreme comments that self-professed Christians made immediately following Blair Scott’s appearance to express his views on Fox TV.

Facebook Christians Advocating Death, Rape and Harm to Athiests

The list below represents just some of the comments that were captured before the content was deleted. Each commentator’s name is linked to their Facebook profile if it can be found, along with the quote attributed to that person. (If you find an inaccuracy or omission please let me know.)

Paul Altum

i say kill them all and let them see for themselves that there is God

Bob O’Connell

Shoot them. Shoot to kill.

Joe Martinez

To ALL ATHEIEST DIE AN GO TO HELL HAHA IF I COULD ID SHOOT ALL OF YOU IN THE HEAD WITH A 12GUAGE

Joseph Sneckenberg

thats easy shoot them

Casey M Jones

Shoot em. At least we know where they’re going, waste of oxygen

Mike Holeschek

Nail them to the cross then display it.

Chris Dunn

I thinly we should hang the leader of that group on the cross with nails through their hands and feet, place a crown of thorns upon their head, RAM a spear through their side all after being whipped and beaten publicly! Just so they can endure what Christ dod so they understand the sacrifice behind what that cross symbolizes.

Bob O’Connell

They’re atheists so it won’t matter if you kill them.

Tim Allison

KILL THEM.

Richard Silvia

someone show me where they live&and they will live no mere!

Raylene Ingmire

Here’s my solution, kill the group..just kidding, you figure it out. I’m so sick of people that pick and choose when they want to truly be American. They can go to Hell oh wait they will.

Sindy Clock

stupid atheists, I hope God kills them all.

Sindy Clock

I love Jesus, and the cross and if you dont, I hope someone rapes you!

Eileen Rourke

Any court or lawyer who takes this case should be hung!!!! If you look at some of the people who are atheists they are all miserable looking because they don’t have any faith in anything. You should all go live in another country. You have taken enough of my rights away.

Hans Anderson

atheist has no rights a snail has more rights than a atheist has I say throw them out to the sharks let them eat them like the ate bin laden

Michael Perri

these people are f’ing scum of the earth. can we start killing them now? few groups are filled with more hatred than atheists.

Scott Miller

IF THE CROSS OFFENDS YOU: SO SHOULD THIS COUNTRY; LEAVE BEFORE WE KILL YOU!!!!

Patrick Alley

Kill em all…let God sort em out. Guess what Atheists…

So, What Do You Think?

There have also been a lot of Tweets related to this issue, but I’m really wondering what YOU think about it?

• Christians, is it really acceptable to say, “I’m not like them. Those aren’t real Christians!” After all, the people who made these comments would say the exact same thing about you.
• Non-Christian people who identify with another religion, do you think your religion should be able to display a memorial to the believers who died alongside the Christians?
• Non-believers, is it really so important to warrant a national campaign to not allow a single Christian symbol at a monument for the dead?

I am DYING to hear what you guys think…

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President Barack Obama's Birth Certificate

About a week ago President Barack Obama had his birth certificate shared on the White House blog. In addition, he went before the press to talk about the release of evidence regarding “the site of my birth”.

This following video is of President Obama addressing the nation regarding the release of his birth certificate. This preceded the blog post, but was presumably right around the same time.

This link is to the direct download of the PDF from the official WhiteHouse.GOV site:
http://whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/rss_viewer/birth-certificate-long-form.pdf
And in case it gets taken down eventually, here is a copy of the file which I personally downloaded and then uploaded to my own server:
President Obama’s Birth Certificate.

After this was posted to the web, a YouTuber by the handle of orangegold1 posted a video walk through of an examination of the birth certificate in which he claims that it has been “faked”.

It does indeed appear to me that someone has gone in and heavily edited this document. Questions arise such as:

• Why would someone do this?
• Who did it?
• Was it done at the President’s order?
• Is the President even aware of the editing?

Some people will jump to the conclusion that there is some sort of conspiracy going on here. But what are some other alternatives? I could imagine the following scenario:

President Obama, wanting to put the matter of his citizenship to rest tells some staffer to go ahead and post his birth certificate.

They go and get it from whereever it is normally kept, but the document is 50 years old and faded. They discuss it with the President and he says, “Can you enhance the image a bit so people can read it better or something?” Because he’s just thinking they can use a really good scanner or something to make it look right.

The staffer decides to spend like 10 hours doing a crappy job of “cleaning up” the birth certificate in Adobe Illustrator, and then like a complete amateur posts a PDF of their work on the site with all of the layer information still present.

What do YOU think?

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Osama bin Laden is Dead

Just a few hours ago President Obama went on TV to tell the world that the US finally got Osama bin Laden.

After a 10 year hunt spanning two Presidents, Obama is finally able to lay claim to the death of America’s public enemy number one. The predictions about how this will change things have already begun.

People are already speculating that:

• This will help Obama during his re-election campaign
• The stock market will improve
• The world will be a safer place.

Whether or not hunting down bin Laden will really have these effects is yet to be seen…

President Obama’s Report of Osama bin Laden’s Death

Details About the Raid that Killed Osama Bin Laden

The complete White House press briefing after the President’s address can be found here. But the most interesting stuff follows.

First, a video alleged to be the compound where bin Laden was killed, engulfed in flames:

And here is the Google Map of what is alleged to be the location of the compound:

View Larger Map

SENIOR ADMINISTRATION OFFICIAL: Thank you. The bottom line of our collection and our analysis was that we had high confidence that the compound harbored a high-value terrorist target. The experts who worked this issue for years assessed that there was a strong probability that the terrorist that was hiding there was Osama bin Laden.

What I’d like to do is walk you through the key points in that intelligence trail that led us to that conclusion. From the time that we first recognized bin Laden as a threat, the CIA gathered leads on individuals in bin Laden’s inner circle, including his personal couriers. Detainees in the post-9/11 period flagged for us individuals who may have been providing direct support to bin Laden and his deputy, Zawahiri, after their escape from Afghanistan.

One courier in particular had our constant attention. Detainees gave us his nom de guerre or his nickname and identified him as both a protégé of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the mastermind of September 11th, and a trusted assistant of Abu Faraj al-Libbi, the former number three of al Qaeda who was captured in 2005.

Detainees also identified this man as one of the few al Qaeda couriers trusted by bin Laden. They indicated he might be living with and protecting bin Laden. But for years, we were unable to identify his true name or his location.

Four years ago, we uncovered his identity, and for operational reasons, I can’t go into details about his name or how we identified him, but about two years ago, after months of persistent effort, we identified areas in Pakistan where the courier and his brother operated. Still we were unable to pinpoint exactly where they lived, due to extensive operational security on their part. The fact that they were being so careful reinforced our belief that we were on the right track.

Then in August 2010, we found their residence, a compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan, a town about 35 miles north of Islamabad. The area is relatively affluent, with lots of retired military. It’s also insolated from the natural disasters and terrorist attacks that have afflicted other parts of Pakistan. When we saw the compound where the brothers lived, we were shocked by what we saw — an extraordinarily unique compound. The compound sits on a large plot of land in an area that was relatively secluded when it was built. It is roughly eight times larger than the other homes in the area.

When the compound was built in 2005, it was on the outskirts of the town center, at the end of a narrow dirt road. In the last six years, some residential homes have been built nearby. The physical security measures of the compound are extraordinary. It has 12- to 18-foot walls topped with barbed wire. Internal wall sections — internal walls sectioned off different portions of the compound to provide extra privacy. Access to the compound is restricted by two security gates, and the residents of the compound burn their trash, unlike their neighbors, who put the trash out for collection.

The main structure, a three-story building, has few windows facing the outside of the compound. A terrace on the third floor has a seven-foot wall privacy — has a seven-foot privacy wall.

It’s also noteworthy that the property is valued at approximately $1 million but has no telephone or Internet service connected to it. The brothers had no explainable source of wealth.

Intelligence analysts concluded that this compound was custom built to hide someone of significance. We soon learned that more people were living at the compound than the two brothers and their families. A third family lived there — one whose size and whose makeup matched the bin Laden family members that we believed most likely to be with Osama bin Laden. Our best assessment, based on a large body of reporting from multiple sources, was that bin Laden was living there with several family members, including his youngest wife.

Everything we saw — the extremely elaborate operational security, the brothers’ background and their behavior, and the location and the design of the compound itself was perfectly consistent with what our experts expected bin Laden’s hideout to look like. Keep in mind that two of bin Laden’s gatekeepers, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed and Abu Faraj al-Libbi, were arrested in the settled areas of Pakistan.

Our analysts looked at this from every angle, considering carefully who other than bin Laden could be at the compound. We conducted red team exercises and other forms of alternative analysis to check our work. No other candidate fit the bill as well as bin Laden did.

So the final conclusion, from an intelligence standpoint, was twofold. We had high confidence that a high-value target was being harbored by the brothers on the compound, and we assessed that there was a strong probability that that person was Osama bin Laden.

Now let me turn it over to my colleague.

SENIOR ADMINISTRATION OFFICIAL: Thank you. Earlier this afternoon, a small U.S. team conducted a helicopter raid on the compound. Considerable planning helped prepare our operators for this very complex mission. Senior officials have been involved in the decision-making and planning for this operation for months, and briefed the President regularly. My colleague has already mentioned the unusual characteristics of this compound. Each of these, including the high walls, security features, suburban location, and proximity to Islamabad made this an especially dangerous operation.

The men who executed this mission accepted this risk, practiced to minimize those risks, and understood the importance of the target to the national security of the United States.

I know you understand that I can’t and won’t get into many details of this mission, but I’ll share what I can. This operation was a surgical raid by a small team designed to minimize collateral damage and to pose as little risk as possible to non-combatants on the compound or to Pakistani civilians in the neighborhood.

Our team was on the compound for under 40 minutes and did not encounter any local authorities while performing the raid. In addition to Osama bin Laden, three adult males were killed in the raid. We believe two were the couriers and the third was bin Laden’s adult son.

There were several women and children at the compound. One woman was killed when she was used as a shield by a male combatant. Two other women were injured.

During the raid, we lost one helicopter due to mechanical failure. The aircraft was destroyed by the crew and the assault force and crew members boarded the remaining aircraft to exit the compound. All non-combatants were moved safely away from the compound before the detonation.

What Are They Doing With Osama bin Laden’s Body?

According to the Associated Press:

WASHINGTON (AP) — A U.S. official says Osama bin Laden has been buried at sea.
After bin Laden was killed in a raid by U.S. forces in Pakistan, senior administration officials said the body would be handled according to Islamic practice and tradition.

That practice calls for the body to be buried within 24 hours, the official said. Finding a country willing to accept the remains of the world’s most wanted terrorist would have been difficult, the official said. So the U.S. decided to bury him at sea.

The official, who spoke Monday on condition of anonymity to discuss sensitive national security matters, did not immediately say where that occurred.

Transcript of President Obama’s Address on Osama bin Laden

REMARKS BY THE PRESIDENT ON OSAMA BIN LADEN
East Room
11:35 P.M. EDT

THE PRESIDENT: Good evening. Tonight, I can report to the American people and to the world that the United States has conducted an operation that killed Osama bin Laden, the leader of al Qaeda, and a terrorist who’s responsible for the murder of thousands of innocent men, women, and children.

It was nearly 10 years ago that a bright September day was darkened by the worst attack on the American people in our history. The images of 9/11 are seared into our national memory — hijacked planes cutting through a cloudless September sky; the Twin Towers collapsing to the ground; black smoke billowing up from the Pentagon; the wreckage of Flight 93 in Shanksville, Pennsylvania, where the actions of heroic citizens saved even more heartbreak and destruction.

And yet we know that the worst images are those that were unseen to the world. The empty seat at the dinner table. Children who were forced to grow up without their mother or their father. Parents who would never know the feeling of their child’s embrace. Nearly 3,000 citizens taken from us, leaving a gaping hole in our hearts.

On September 11, 2001, in our time of grief, the American people came together. We offered our neighbors a hand, and we offered the wounded our blood. We reaffirmed our ties to each other, and our love of community and country. On that day, no matter where we came from, what God we prayed to, or what race or ethnicity we were, we were united as one American family.

We were also united in our resolve to protect our nation and to bring those who committed this vicious attack to justice. We quickly learned that the 9/11 attacks were carried out by al Qaeda — an organization headed by Osama bin Laden, which had openly declared war on the United States and was committed to killing innocents in our country and around the globe. And so we went to war against al Qaeda to protect our citizens, our friends, and our allies.

Over the last 10 years, thanks to the tireless and heroic work of our military and our counterterrorism professionals, we’ve made great strides in that effort. We’ve disrupted terrorist attacks and strengthened our homeland defense. In Afghanistan, we removed the Taliban government, which had given bin Laden and al Qaeda safe haven and support. And around the globe, we worked with our friends and allies to capture or kill scores of al Qaeda terrorists, including several who were a part of the 9/11 plot.

Yet Osama bin Laden avoided capture and escaped across the Afghan border into Pakistan. Meanwhile, al Qaeda continued to operate from along that border and operate through its affiliates across the world.

And so shortly after taking office, I directed Leon Panetta, the director of the CIA, to make the killing or capture of bin Laden the top priority of our war against al Qaeda, even as we continued our broader efforts to disrupt, dismantle, and defeat his network.

Then, last August, after years of painstaking work by our intelligence community, I was briefed on a possible lead to bin Laden. It was far from certain, and it took many months to run this thread to ground. I met repeatedly with my national security team as we developed more information about the possibility that we had located bin Laden hiding within a compound deep inside of Pakistan. And finally, last week, I determined that we had enough intelligence to take action, and authorized an operation to get Osama bin Laden and bring him to justice.

Today, at my direction, the United States launched a targeted operation against that compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan. A small team of Americans carried out the operation with extraordinary courage and capability. No Americans were harmed. They took care to avoid civilian casualties. After a firefight, they killed Osama bin Laden and took custody of his body.

For over two decades, bin Laden has been al Qaeda’s leader and symbol, and has continued to plot attacks against our country and our friends and allies. The death of bin Laden marks the most significant achievement to date in our nation’s effort to defeat al Qaeda.

Yet his death does not mark the end of our effort. There’s no doubt that al Qaeda will continue to pursue attacks against us. We must –- and we will — remain vigilant at home and abroad.

As we do, we must also reaffirm that the United States is not –- and never will be -– at war with Islam. I’ve made clear, just as President Bush did shortly after 9/11, that our war is not against Islam. Bin Laden was not a Muslim leader; he was a mass murderer of Muslims. Indeed, al Qaeda has slaughtered scores of Muslims in many countries, including our own. So his demise should be welcomed by all who believe in peace and human dignity.

Over the years, I’ve repeatedly made clear that we would take action within Pakistan if we knew where bin Laden was. That is what we’ve done. But it’s important to note that our counterterrorism cooperation with Pakistan helped lead us to bin Laden and the compound where he was hiding. Indeed, bin Laden had declared war against Pakistan as well, and ordered attacks against the Pakistani people.

Tonight, I called President Zardari, and my team has also spoken with their Pakistani counterparts. They agree that this is a good and historic day for both of our nations. And going forward, it is essential that Pakistan continue to join us in the fight against al Qaeda and its affiliates.

The American people did not choose this fight. It came to our shores, and started with the senseless slaughter of our citizens. After nearly 10 years of service, struggle, and sacrifice, we know well the costs of war. These efforts weigh on me every time I, as Commander-in-Chief, have to sign a letter to a family that has lost a loved one, or look into the eyes of a service member who’s been gravely wounded.

So Americans understand the costs of war. Yet as a country, we will never tolerate our security being threatened, nor stand idly by when our people have been killed. We will be relentless in defense of our citizens and our friends and allies. We will be true to the values that make us who we are. And on nights like this one, we can say to those families who have lost loved ones to al Qaeda’s terror: Justice has been done.

Tonight, we give thanks to the countless intelligence and counterterrorism professionals who’ve worked tirelessly to achieve this outcome. The American people do not see their work, nor know their names. But tonight, they feel the satisfaction of their work and the result of their pursuit of justice.

We give thanks for the men who carried out this operation, for they exemplify the professionalism, patriotism, and unparalleled courage of those who serve our country. And they are part of a generation that has borne the heaviest share of the burden since that September day.

Finally, let me say to the families who lost loved ones on 9/11 that we have never forgotten your loss, nor wavered in our commitment to see that we do whatever it takes to prevent another attack on our shores.

And tonight, let us think back to the sense of unity that prevailed on 9/11. I know that it has, at times, frayed. Yet today’s achievement is a testament to the greatness of our country and the determination of the American people.

The cause of securing our country is not complete. But tonight, we are once again reminded that America can do whatever we set our mind to. That is the story of our history, whether it’s the pursuit of prosperity for our people, or the struggle for equality for all our citizens; our commitment to stand up for our values abroad, and our sacrifices to make the world a safer place.

Let us remember that we can do these things not just because of wealth or power, but because of who we are: one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Thank you. May God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America.

Man Unknowingly Live-Tweets Osama Bin Laden Raid

Sohaib Athar, or @ReallyVirtual on Twitter, live-tweeted the raid in which Osama bin Laden was killed. The IT-consultant apparently found out hours later that he had been witnessing a super-secret mission by US troops. For more, go to this WebBeat.TV article.

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Oil Refinery Burning in Japan After 2011 Earthquake

Let me know if you find this helpful and I’ll try and do it more often in the future. As for now, on to the updates…

Tsunami Wave Height

Here’s a good look at the tsunami that did all the damage. The following image from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) illustrates the expected wave heights and location after the March 11, 2011 Japanese earthquake. Note that the deep purple color is 120cm in height, or about 4 feet.

NOAA 2011 Japanese Tsunami Wave Height

A Summary of Earthquake and Tsunami Disaster

A few key takeaways:

• Fourth largest earthquake ever measured.
• Biggest nuclear accident since Chernobyl.
• 3,000+ confirmed dead, but suspect over 10,000.
• Easily over 100 billion dollars worth of damage so far.

Reuters also had a nice summary post, here are a few of the key points:

• Work has been halted at the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear plant and workers moved to a safe place after a rise in radiation, suggesting the crisis was out of control.
• Japan seeks direct U.S. Military help to cool reactors.
• Fuel rods in the No. 1 reactor were 70 percent damaged and the rods in the No. 2 reactor were 33 percent damaged, Kyodo says.
• Japan’s benchmark Nikkei average rises more than 6 percent in early trading Wednesday after suffering its worst two-day rout since 1987.
• The radiation level in Tokyo was 10 times normal on Tuesday evening, but there was no threat to human health, the city government says.
• People within a 30-km radius of the nuclear facility urged to stay indoors.
• Food and water in short supply in parts of the northeast. hundreds of thousands have been evacuated, shelters are packed.
• Rolling power blackouts will affect 5 million households Tuesday, TEPCO says.
• Some residents leave the capital. Others stock up on food.
• Death toll is expected to exceed 10,000, and rescue workers are continuing to search coastal cities for survivors.

The Devastation

Here is a video from the Associated Press:

Photos of the 2011 Earthquake / Tsunami

Here are a few photos of the disaster. Some are from Boston’s The Big Picture: ‘Massive earthquake hits Japan’. Some are from the US Navy. Others are from other places. Click on any image to see the larger views.

More News Coverage and Commentary

From USA Today: Japan disaster spreads worry across Pacific to U.S.

The extent of Japan’s devastation, aside from the nuclear worries, became clearer. The U.S. Agency for International Development, citing Japanese government sources, said 60,000 buildings were destroyed or damaged, as well as 704 roads, 26 bridges and eight railways. Transportation remained paralyzed, the United Nations’ humanitarian office said, and about 371,800 people were housed in government-established shelters.

The government said 1.25 million households remained without electricity and 1.4 million homes had no access to safe drinking water.

Tokyo Electric Power suspended rolling blackouts but asked customers to limit power use. A fire at an oil refinery 25 miles east of Tokyo, ignited after the earthquake, continued to burn.

Financial Impact

Japan’s damage will likely cost well over $100 Billion according to the New York Times:

Apart from an expected $35 billion in insurance claims from last week’s earthquake, the financial losses in Japan will probably fall most heavily on the Japanese government once it tallies the damage from the tsunami and the nuclear disaster.

Japanese insurance companies, global insurers and reinsurers, hedge funds and other investors in catastrophe bonds are all expected to bear a portion of the losses that seem likely to exceed $100 billion. Total damage from the 1995 earthquake in Kobe, Japan, was estimated at $100 billion, according to the Insurance Information Institute, but only about $3 billion of that was covered by insurance.

The disaster in Japan is causing not only a tremendous amount of financial impact in Japan, but also in other countries. The US economic impact is detailed by USA Today’s Money column:

The global financial turmoil sparked by Japan’s earthquake, tsunami and nuclear crisis — which has wiped out about $300 billion in U.S. stock values alone this week — is particularly troubling for the United States and several other countries, where an economic recovery has been showing signs of derailing because political unrest in Libya and the Middle East has led to a sharp run-up in crude oil prices.

Already, the turmoil in Japan is affecting U.S. companies, investors and consumers, threatening disruptions in the flow of products and parts used to manufacture everything from Apple iPads to Sony televisions.

Have you seen more interesting coverage? Please let me know or drop a link in the comments. Thanks!

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Well, for years I’ve been recommending Roboform and even put together a Roboform Tutorial for their great desktop version for Windows and even Mac. Their iPhone app is also in wide circulation, and I think they had a really basic Android app out previously, but for Android users (like me) I’ve got a world exclusive first screenshot of the soon to be released app.

The New Roboform for Android

To quote my super secret source:

In the initial release it will work as a viewer primarily for Logins, Identities, and Safenotes. Automated login functionality will also be available similar to the iPhone app. (A RoboForm Everywhere (Online) account is required.)

We don’t have a lot of detail beyond this, but I suspect that what it means is that if you are using Roboform on your desktop you can sync your data to the cloud, and then in turn sync it to the Android platform for access on the go.

I don’t think you’ll be able to add new data on the app initially, but I’d imagine that’s something they’ll be adding in a later iteration. It does sound to me like this Android app is going to actually store your passwords on the device and simply sync from the cloud periodically to keep everything up to date.

What do you think? Have you used the current version of the app, and if so what are you hoping to see in this completely revamped version?

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Cairo Egypt - Tahrir Square

However, today I received an email from Ossama Hassanein, Chairman of the Board for TechWadi – an organization that supports entrepreneurship in the middle east. Ossama was passing along the following letter from his daughter, which recounts her first hand experiences of what has transpired over the past week. I found the message eye-opening and it helped me gain an understanding of what has been going on.

Dear All,

Thank you all for your messages in the past few days. I was very touched by how many of you thought of me and reached out.

The past few days have been an emotional roller coaster. We have seen Egypt in all its glory and all its despair.

Egypt's Mubarak

Tuesday, January 25th, (Police Day – a national holiday) was the beginning of a revolution. That day, my friends and I for the most part, did not participate in any demonstrations. Wednesday and Thursday were normal working days, although some people continued to demonstrate, and huge demonstrations were planned for Friday. When we saw what happened that day, many of us became determined to participate in the demonstrations on Friday. (The weekend in Egypt is Friday and Saturday). Friday morning we woke up to find that all mobile telephony and Internet had been cut. Many of you probably do not know that since Mubarak came into power 30 years ago, the country has been operating under emergency law which makes any form of assembly illegal. Until last week, most people shied away from any anti-government demonstrations because the consequences were undoubtedly severe punishment by the brutal Egyptian Police Force.

Police Response to Egyptian Protests

Inspired by the events that took place in Tunis, and the sheer number of people who were moved through Facebook and other social media websites, people were no longer afraid to engage in peaceful demonstrations on Friday. As a girl, I was discouraged by my friends from participating on Friday. The protesters that day were brutally attacked by the Police with tear gas and rubber bullets. The Police used indiscriminate force to try to disperse the crowds, but the masses – who mostly have very little to lose, put up an enormous fight. The stories from that day are incredible. Many of the shops in the streets stayed open and provided water and juice for the protesters who were being attacked. The protesters were determined that it remain a peaceful demonstration. One man with a Dodge Ram took it upon himself to pick up injured protesters in his truck, drive them to safety, and then come back with drinks for the protesters. The army, who is very much loved and respected by the people moved in that evening, and all the Police in Egypt mysteriously disappeared. They were ordered by a higher force to leave so that chaos would ensue, and the people would call out for them to come back.

Friday evening, Mubarak addressed the nation. His speech was a slap in the face. No concessions were made except that he dissolved the Cabinet of Ministers, which was perhaps the only thing he had going for him. He even went so far as to say that he ‘made the demonstrations possible’ on Friday, and blamed the corruption in the government entirely on his cabinet. His speech added more fuel to the fire.

Egypt - Police and Protestors Clash

Saturday, the number of protesters grew as people became more determined to remove him from power. The newly appointed cabinet was a joke, and included many corrupt people from the ‘previous’ regime. Mubarak appointed Omar Suleiman as his first VP. This gave a certain amount of hope as he is generally respected and people would accept him as the leader of a transitional government. The mobile service was restored for phone calls, but no messages or instant messaging and no Internet. That day, it became known that thousands of prisoners were released from prison. Prisons and police stations were emptied of their fire arms by thugs. They began looting Friday night, and continued throughout Saturday. It is believed that many of the looters were actually members of the Police Force who were still MIA. Late Saturday evening, the military moved into the neighborhoods to start providing protection. Also on Saturday, a neighborhood watch began where all the men in the neighborhoods began working in shifts using any weapons they had, ranging from kitchen knives and golf clubs to fire arms, to protect our homes. Luckily, through the protection of the military, and our own brave men who patrolled the streets, safety and order were restored, and I believe the media played a major role in enlarging the magnitude of the threat. Thank God, no one I know was attacked or had their homes broken into.

Saturday-Tuesday were amazing days of hope for our country. In the neighborhoods, in addition to the neighborhood watch, people took it upon themselves to collect trash in the neighborhood, and direct the traffic. Demonstrations took place every single day. The message was clear, Mubarak and his regime should step down. I myself participated in demonstrations on Saturday, Monday, and Tuesday. People from every walk of life were there, rich, poor, old, young, Christians, Copts, Muslims, men, women, children. The atmosphere in the demonstrations was one of true camaraderie. Great emphasis was placed on the peaceful nature of the demonstrations. Civilians volunteered to search all entrants to the demonstrations to ensure no weapons entered. People passed out food and water to the people around them. We all felt our country was truly united. Tuesday, the million man march was planned. The turnout was outstanding. People were hopeful. It is important to note two things: 1) The demonstrations had no political or religious agenda – The only request was for Mubarak and his regime to step down. 2) No clear head or direction for leadership had emerged which worried many people, including myself, that we simply didn’t (and still don’t) know what will happen on the other end if and when Mubarak stepped down. We are fearful of chaos and any Islamist movement through the Muslim Brotherhood – long the boogey man used by the Egyptian government to discourage any shift of power.

Midan Tahrir (Liberation Square) in Cairo

Tuesday night Mubarak addressed the nation in a speech riddled with emotion. He announced he would not be running in the next elections, and that he never intended to (although just a few months ago he made a speech saying he would ‘serve’ Egypt until his dying breath). He also said that he would oversee amendments to articles 76 and 77 of the constitution which would 1) Limit the number of terms any President could stay in power, and 2) Change the terms that restrict pretty much anyone for becoming a presidential candidate. There were several holes in his speech. 1) The people overseeing these changes are all part of the old guard and no one trusts them. 2) He provided no guarantees of how the coming elections would be secured freely and fairly. 3) Nothing was mentioned regarding restricting his son from coming back to run for Presidency. 4) How can anyone trust a President who over the past few days allowed the Police to attack its own people in plain view, not to mention over the past 30 years? The same evening, the Opposition Parties formed a coalition and announced they were all in agreement about steps that should be taken, and were willing to engage in a dialogue with the Vice President, but they would only step in once Mubarak left. We were torn last night between relief that he had agreed to step down, and fear that, in fact, no change would take place, and no true concessions had actually been made. We thought that perhaps we should give him the benefit of the doubt.

I woke up this morning feeling hopeful. The Internet service was restored. I started thinking of ways to form groups with my friends to come up with our own agenda of things we could do to serve our country. I felt that we needed to quickly capitalize on the sense of unity that had been achieved in the past few days to bridge the gap between the haves and the have nots. It was no longer enough to sit idly on the sidelines and wait for things to improve in Egypt. Every single one of us had participated in this movement for change, and we needed to see it through to the end at every level.

Eyptian Police Fire Tear Gas at Crowds

Now, it is clear we have been deceived. This morning we went to Tahrir square to see what the word on the street is. People continued to demonstrate peacefully. On our way in, we were searched as usual to make sure that no weapons were coming in. However, aggressive ‘pro-Mubarak’ supporters began flowing in. Another demonstration with a large number of ‘pro-Mubarak’ supporters was happening nearby, and was resolved to march into Tahrir square and force the demonstrators out. We felt the situation would become dangerous and took a taxi to a friend parents’ house. Within half an hour, we saw on TV large crowds of ‘pro-Mubarak’ supporters storming Tahrir square with sticks and knives to attack the unarmed demonstrators. Men on camel and horseback rode into the square armed with clubs to attack.

We are now convinced that Mubarak and his regime did not intend to change anything. The scenes on TV now are of Molotov cocktails being thrown at the protesters. Tahrir square is turning into a blood bath. One of our friends was caught in the middle of Tahrir. The ‘pro-Mubarak’ supporters had closed off all exit points to the square. (Thank God he has since been able to escape.) There are reports that many of the ‘pro-Mubarak’ supporters were paid to attack the demonstrators, and also that many if not all of them are actually from the secret service. These attacks are clearly being perpetuated by Mubarak’s regime.

This is a very sad day for Egypt. Throughout the week, many people felt the need to leave the country for safety reasons. I felt the need to stay and show support. And I felt safer than ever because of the way everyone banded together. Now, I don’t know what will happen next. I feel truly betrayed. Who will save us?

I hope we are able to receive enough support and pressure from the United States and every other country to force this cruel regime to step down for good.

–
Dina Hassanein

As additional information to Dina’s first hand account, here are a couple of videos. This first one shows police firing indiscriminately into crowds.

This next one shows some of the chaos that is taking place within the mobs:

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TSA Full Body Scanner

“We Don’t Save The Photos.” Really?!?

Despite promises that these full body scanning systems will not save naked photos of you, recently it was discovered that 35,000 photos of naked citizens were being stored by the U.S. Marshal’s Service (another Federal agency) and over 100 of those photos were leaked.

In response to this, the TSA posted on their official site:

Myth: TSA Advanced Imaging Technology (AIT) images can be stored on the AIT machines located in our airports.
Fact: Completely false – TSA’s machines should not be confused with the recent stories about the U.S. Marshals Service. The machines used by TSA at our airports cannot store, print or transmit images. They simply don’t have that ability.

Note the claim that the images are not transmitted? Yet they’ve also told us that the images are transmitted to another location where a different TSA agent is viewing them. So which of their two stories are we to believe?

They are also being extremely specific when they say the LOCAL machines at the airports don’t store images. I’m willing to bet images are being stored in a central system somewhere, just not LOCALLY. Considering that the TSA is also certainly tapped into every flight manifest, it doesn’t take much work to start matching up images with travelers so they can build a database of what every man, woman and child in the US looks like in their birthday suit.

Remember, it only takes ONE employee with access to take home millions of scans on a portable drive to ruin your day. And these things happen all the time.

So What? How Detailed Could The Images Be?

Well, you tell me what you think. Here is a scan that was simply inverted to show you what’s possible. The TSA technology is MUCH higher resolution than this.

In fact, in England, use of full-body scanners is considered a violation of child pornography laws, and the machines are banned for children under 18.

What if You Opt Out of the Body Scanner?

Well, I’ll tell you since the TSA doesn’t. I’ve opted out about 90% of the time, unless I’m in a huge hurry – and even then it didn’t always help.

When you opt out of a body scan you are placed into a separate line where you wait for the next available TSA agent to come get you and do a screening. In literally every case except one when I did this I had a TSA agent with a very bad attitude come get me. (More about that in a minute.)

• The agent will ask you where your items are that went through the metal detector and then carry all of them over to a table. You are not allowed to touch your stuff or help carry it. You stand there and wait.
• Next, the agent will tell you what they are about to do and describe how they are going to frisk you using the front of their hand in places that are not sensitive, and the back in other places.
• They they have you hold your arms to the side and begin to frisk you. When they get to your genitals they absolutely go all the way there – every time. YES, you will have their hands on your junk. (Hopefully you enjoy that kind of thing.)

For females who go through the screening process, they will use the back of their hands to rub completely around the outside of your breasts. The bad news is, you will be fondled. The good news is that it doesn’t cost you a dime to get felt up!

By the way, Dave Barry had similar experiences with the TSA you can read about here, and here’s a little video about the new pat down procedures:

Lets say that you decide to forgo the manhandling and breeze through the body scanner! Well, 50% of the time when I’ve done that I still get dragged aside for the probe! Damn! This tells me that you might as well not even bother and move straight on to the anal probe.

Why do All the TSA Agents Have Bad Attitudes?

I don’t know if dealing with so many people every day makes you numb or what, but 90% of the TSA agents that I’ve interacted with treat me like cattle. This lack of treating people with respect and dignity comes from the top. If the executive leadership demanded it, it would filter down. But clearly they do not.

Here is an example of how unreasonable TSA agents can be:

I’ve had several screeners come up to me and ask questions in accusatory and demeaning ways, and when I respond in a similar fashion they act as though I have no right to question them or attempt to retain some shred of human dignity. I’ve also experienced what can only be described as threats and intimidation.

One agent went so far as to attempt to “stare me down” when he overheard me speaking to a travel partner saying that I didn’t believe this made us any safer.

What Else is the TSA Wasting Money On?

I’ve got two words for you – behavior detection. Did you know the TSA has 3,000 agents deployed in airports across the country at an annual cost of $200,000,000 trained in “behavior detection”. Yet they’ve never apprehended a single terrorist.

Oh, and the GAO released a report that said at least 16 individuals later accused of involvement in terrorist plots flew 23 different times through U.S. airports since 2004. Yet none were stopped by TSA behavior detection officers working at those airports. None.

The bottom line is, the TSA spends $6.3 BILLION per year, has 60,000 employees, and has does not seem to have made us safer. Their argument might be that TSA run programs prevent people from even trying… but security existed in the airports for decades prior to the TSA and the results were no different.

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Although the outward signs of Zeller’s life might seem normal enough, he was apparently battling a raging fire of torment inside caused by sexual abuse as a child. Something he shared with no one until his death. It goes to show you how terrible that kind of abuse can be, and what should be done to the perpetrators.

It also raises the questions about the morality of suicide. As Bill puts it:

“People say suicide is selfish. I think it’s selfish to ask people to continue living painful and miserable lives, just so you possibly won’t feel sad for a week or two. Suicide may be a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but it’s also a permanent solution to a ~23 year-old problem that grows more intense and overwhelming every day.”

Personally, I believe that people should be able to not only determine how they want to live their life, but also how they want to end it. It reminds me of the story of the elderly British couple who committed suicide together.

And now, the final message from Bill Zeller (set aside some time, its over 4,000 words):

I have the urge to declare my sanity and justify my actions, but I assume I’ll never be able to convince anyone that this was the right decision. Maybe it’s true that anyone who does this is insane by definition, but I can at least explain my reasoning. I considered not writing any of this because of how personal it is, but I like tying up loose ends and don’t want people to wonder why I did this. Since I’ve never spoken to anyone about what happened to me, people would likely draw the wrong conclusions.

My first memories as a child are of being raped, repeatedly. This has affected every aspect of my life. This darkness, which is the only way I can describe it, has followed me like a fog, but at times intensified and overwhelmed me, usually triggered by a distinct situation. In kindergarten I couldn’t use the bathroom and would stand petrified whenever I needed to, which started a trend of awkward and unexplained social behavior. The damage that was done to my body still prevents me from using the bathroom normally, but now it’s less of a physical impediment than a daily reminder of what was done to me.

This darkness followed me as I grew up. I remember spending hours playing with legos, having my world consist of me and a box of cold, plastic blocks. Just waiting for everything to end. It’s the same thing I do now, but instead of legos it’s surfing the web or reading or listening to a baseball game. Most of my life has been spent feeling dead inside, waiting for my body to catch up.

At times growing up I would feel inconsolable rage, but I never connected this to what happened until puberty. I was able to keep the darkness at bay for a few hours at a time by doing things that required intense concentration, but it would always come back. Programming appealed to me for this reason. I was never particularly fond of computers or mathematically inclined, but the temporary peace it would provide was like a drug. But the darkness always returned and built up something like a tolerance, because programming has become less and less of a refuge.

The darkness is with me nearly every time I wake up. I feel like a grime is covering me. I feel like I’m trapped in a contimated body that no amount of washing will clean. Whenever I think about what happened I feel manic and itchy and can’t concentrate on anything else. It manifests itself in hours of eating or staying up for days at a time or sleeping for sixteen hours straight or week long programming binges or constantly going to the gym. I’m exhausted from feeling like this every hour of every day.

Three to four nights a week I have nightmares about what happened. It makes me avoid sleep and constantly tired, because sleeping with what feels like hours of nightmares is not restful. I wake up sweaty and furious. I’m reminded every morning of what was done to me and the control it has over my life.

I’ve never been able to stop thinking about what happened to me and this hampered my social interactions. I would be angry and lost in thought and then be interrupted by someone saying “Hi” or making small talk, unable to understand why I seemed cold and distant. I walked around, viewing the outside world from a distant portal behind my eyes, unable to perform normal human niceties. I wondered what it would be like to take to other people without what happened constantly on my mind, and I wondered if other people had similar experiences that they were better able to mask.

Alcohol was also something that let me escape the darkness. It would always find me later, though, and it was always angry that I managed to escape and it made me pay. Many of the irresponsible things I did were the result of the darkness. Obviously I’m responsible for every decision and action, including this one, but there are reasons why things happen the way they do.

Alcohol and other drugs provided a way to ignore the realities of my situation. It was easy to spend the night drinking and forget that I had no future to look forward to. I never liked what alcohol did to me, but it was better than facing my existence honestly. I haven’t touched alcohol or any other drug in over seven months (and no drugs or alcohol will be involved when I do this) and this has forced me to evaluate my life in an honest and clear way. There’s no future here. The darkness will always be with me.

I used to think if I solved some problem or achieved some goal, maybe he would leave. It was comforting to identify tangible issues as the source of my problems instead of something that I’ll never be able to change. I thought that if I got into to a good college, or a good grad school, or lost weight, or went to the gym nearly every day for a year, or created programs that millions of people used, or spent a summer or California or New York or published papers that I was proud of, then maybe I would feel some peace and not be constantly haunted and unhappy. But nothing I did made a dent in how depressed I was on a daily basis and nothing was in any way fulfilling. I’m not sure why I ever thought that would change anything.

I didn’t realize how deep a hold he had on me and my life until my first relationship. I stupidly assumed that no matter how the darkness affected me personally, my romantic relationships would somehow be separated and protected. Growing up I viewed my future relationships as a possible escape from this thing that haunts me every day, but I began to realize how entangled it was with every aspect of my life and how it is never going to release me. Instead of being an escape, relationships and romantic contact with other people only intensified everything about him that I couldn’t stand. I will never be able to have a relationship in which he is not the focus, affecting every aspect of my romantic interactions.

Relationships always started out fine and I’d be able to ignore him for a few weeks. But as we got closer emotionally the darkness would return and every night it’d be me, her and the darkness in a black and gruesome threesome. He would surround me and penetrate me and the more we did the more intense it became. It made me hate being touched, because as long as we were separated I could view her like an outsider viewing something good and kind and untainted. Once we touched, the darkness would envelope her too and take her over and the evil inside me would surround her. I always felt like I was infecting anyone I was with.

Relationships didn’t work. No one I dated was the right match, and I thought that maybe if I found the right person it would overwhelm him. Part of me knew that finding the right person wouldn’t help, so I became interested in girls who obviously had no interest in me. For a while I thought I was gay. I convinced myself that it wasn’t the darkness at all, but rather my orientation, because this would give me control over why things didn’t feel “right”. The fact that the darkness affected sexual matters most intensely made this idea make some sense and I convinced myself of this for a number of years, starting in college after my first relationship ended. I told people I was gay (at Trinity, not at Princeton), even though I wasn’t attracted to men and kept finding myself interested in girls. Because if being gay wasn’t the answer, then what was? People thought I was avoiding my orientation, but I was actually avoiding the truth, which is that while I’m straight, I will never be content with anyone. I know now that the darkness will never leave.

Last spring I met someone who was unlike anyone else I’d ever met. Someone who showed me just how well two people could get along and how much I could care about another human being. Someone I know I could be with and love for the rest of my life, if I weren’t so fucked up. Amazingly, she liked me. She liked the shell of the man the darkness had left behind. But it didn’t matter because I couldn’t be alone with her. It was never just the two of us, it was always the three of us: her, me and the darkness. The closer we got, the more intensely I’d feel the darkness, like some evil mirror of my emotions. All the closeness we had and I loved was complemented by agony that I couldn’t stand, from him. I realized that I would never be able to give her, or anyone, all of me or only me. She could never have me without the darkness and evil inside me. I could never have just her, without the darkness being a part of all of our interactions. I will never be able to be at peace or content or in a healthy relationship. I realized the futility of the romantic part of my life. If I had never met her, I would have realized this as soon as I met someone else who I meshed similarly well with. It’s likely that things wouldn’t have worked out with her and we would have broken up (with our relationship ending, like the majority of relationships do) even if I didn’t have this problem, since we only dated for a short time. But I will face exactly the same problems with the darkness with anyone else. Despite my hopes, love and compatability is not enough. Nothing is enough. There’s no way I can fix this or even push the darkness down far enough to make a relationship or any type of intimacy feasible.

So I watched as things fell apart between us. I had put an explicit time limit on our relationship, since I knew it couldn’t last because of the darkness and didn’t want to hold her back, and this caused a variety of problems. She was put in an unnatural situation that she never should have been a part of. It must have been very hard for her, not knowing what was actually going on with me, but this is not something I’ve ever been able to talk about with anyone. Losing her was very hard for me as well. Not because of her (I got over our relationship relatively quickly), but because of the realization that I would never have another relationship and because it signified the last true, exclusive personal connection I could ever have. This wasn’t apparent to other people, because I could never talk about the real reasons for my sadness. I was very sad in the summer and fall, but it was not because of her, it was because I will never escape the darkness with anyone. She was so loving and kind to me and gave me everything I could have asked for under the circumstances. I’ll never forget how much happiness she brought me in those briefs moments when I could ignore the darkness. I had originally planned to kill myself last winter but never got around to it. (Parts of this letter were written over a year ago, other parts days before doing this.) It was wrong of me to involve myself in her life if this were a possibility and I should have just left her alone, even though we only dated for a few months and things ended a long time ago. She’s just one more person in a long list of people I’ve hurt.

I could spend pages talking about the other relationships I’ve had that were ruined because of my problems and my confusion related to the darkness. I’ve hurt so many great people because of who I am and my inability to experience what needs to be experienced. All I can say is that I tried to be honest with people about what I thought was true.

I’ve spent my life hurting people. Today will be the last time.

I’ve told different people a lot of things, but I’ve never told anyone about what happened to me, ever, for obvious reasons. It took me a while to realize that no matter how close you are to someone or how much they claim to love you, people simply cannot keep secrets. I learned this a few years ago when I thought I was gay and told people. The more harmful the secret, the juicier the gossip and the more likely you are to be betrayed. People don’t care about their word or what they’ve promised, they just do whatever the fuck they want and justify it later. It feels incredibly lonely to realize you can never share something with someone and have it be between just the two of you. I don’t blame anyone in particular, I guess it’s just how people are. Even if I felt like this is something I could have shared, I have no interest in being part of a friendship or relationship where the other person views me as the damaged and contaminated person that I am. So even if I were able to trust someone, I probably would not have told them about what happened to me. At this point I simply don’t care who knows.

I feel an evil inside me. An evil that makes me want to end life. I need to stop this. I need to make sure I don’t kill someone, which is not something that can be easily undone. I don’t know if this is related to what happened to me or something different. I recognize the irony of killing myself to prevent myself from killing someone else, but this decision should indicate what I’m capable of.

So I’ve realized I will never escape the darkness or misery associated with it and I have a responsibility to stop myself from physically harming others.

I’m just a broken, miserable shell of a human being. Being molested has defined me as a person and shaped me as a human being and it has made me the monster I am and there’s nothing I can do to escape it. I don’t know any other existence. I don’t know what life feels like where I’m apart from any of this. I actively despise the person I am. I just feel fundamentally broken, almost non-human. I feel like an animal that woke up one day in a human body, trying to make sense of a foreign world, living among creatures it doesn’t understand and can’t connect with.

I have accepted that the darkness will never allow me to be in a relationship. I will never go to sleep with someone in my arms, feeling the comfort of their hands around me. I will never know what uncontimated intimacy is like. I will never have an exclusive bond with someone, someone who can be the recipient of all the love I have to give. I will never have children, and I wanted to be a father so badly. I think I would have made a good dad. And even if I had fought through the darkness and married and had children all while being unable to feel intimacy, I could have never done that if suicide were a possibility. I did try to minimize pain, although I know that this decision will hurt many of you. If this hurts you, I hope that you can at least forget about me quickly.

There’s no point in identifying who molested me, so I’m just going to leave it at that. I doubt the word of a dead guy with no evidence about something that happened over twenty years ago would have much sway.

You may wonder why I didn’t just talk to a professional about this. I’ve seen a number of doctors since I was a teenager to talk about other issues and I’m positive that another doctor would not have helped. I was never given one piece of actionable advice, ever. More than a few spent a large part of the session reading their notes to remember who I was. And I have no interest in talking about being raped as a child, both because I know it wouldn’t help and because I have no confidence it would remain secret. I know the legal and practical limits of doctor/patient confidentiality, growing up in a house where we’d hear stories about the various mental illnesses of famous people, stories that were passed down through generations. All it takes is one doctor who thinks my story is interesting enough to share or a doctor who thinks it’s her right or responsibility to contact the authorities and have me identify the molestor (justifying her decision by telling herself that someone else might be in danger). All it takes is a single doctor who violates my trust, just like the “friends” who I told I was gay did, and everything would be made public and I’d be forced to live in a world where people would know how fucked up I am. And yes, I realize this indicates that I have severe trust issues, but they’re based on a large number of experiences with people who have shown a profound disrepect for their word and the privacy of others.

People say suicide is selfish. I think it’s selfish to ask people to continue living painful and miserable lives, just so you possibly won’t feel sad for a week or two. Suicide may be a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but it’s also a permanent solution to a ~23 year-old problem that grows more intense and overwhelming every day.

Some people are just dealt bad hands in this life. I know many people have it worse than I do, and maybe I’m just not a strong person, but I really did try to deal with this. I’ve tried to deal with this every day for the last 23 years and I just can’t fucking take it anymore.

I often wonder what life must be like for other people. People who can feel the love from others and give it back unadulterated, people who can experience sex as an intimate and joyous experience, people who can experience the colors and happenings of this world without constant misery. I wonder who I’d be if things had been different or if I were a stronger person. It sounds pretty great.

I’m prepared for death. I’m prepared for the pain and I am ready to no longer exist. Thanks to the strictness of New Jersey gun laws this will probably be much more painful than it needs to be, but what can you do. My only fear at this point is messing something up and surviving.

—-

I’d also like to address my family, if you can call them that. I despise everything they stand for and I truly hate them, in a non-emotional, dispassionate and what I believe is a healthy way. The world will be a better place when they’re dead—one with less hatred and intolerance.

If you’re unfamiliar with the situation, my parents are fundamentalist Christians who kicked me out of their house and cut me off financially when I was 19 because I refused to attend seven hours of church a week.

They live in a black and white reality they’ve constructed for themselves. They partition the world into good and evil and survive by hating everything they fear or misunderstand and calling it love. They don’t understand that good and decent people exist all around us, “saved” or not, and that evil and cruel people occupy a large percentage of their church. They take advantage of people looking for hope by teaching them to practice the same hatred they practice.

A random example:

“I am personally convinced that if a Muslim truly believes and obeys the Koran, he will be a terrorist.” – George Zeller, August 24, 2010.

If you choose to follow a religion where, for example, devout Catholics who are trying to be good people are all going to Hell but child molestors go to Heaven (as long as they were “saved” at some point), that’s your choice, but it’s fucked up. Maybe a God who operates by those rules does exist. If so, fuck Him.

Their church was always more important than the members of their family and they happily sacrificed whatever necessary in order to satisfy their contrived beliefs about who they should be.

I grew up in a house where love was proxied through a God I could never believe in. A house where the love of music with any sort of a beat was literally beaten out of me. A house full of hatred and intolerance, run by two people who were experts at appearing kind and warm when others were around. Parents who tell an eight year old that his grandmother is going to Hell because she’s Catholic. Parents who claim not to be racist but then talk about the horrors of miscegenation. I could list hundreds of other examples, but it’s tiring.

Since being kicked out, I’ve interacted with them in relatively normal ways. I talk to them on the phone like nothing happened. I’m not sure why. Maybe because I like pretending I have a family. Maybe I like having people I can talk to about what’s been going on in my life. Whatever the reason, it’s not real and it feels like a sham. I should have never allowed this reconnection to happen.

I wrote the above a while ago, and I do feel like that much of the time. At other times, though, I feel less hateful. I know my parents honestly believe the crap they believe in. I know that my mom, at least, loved me very much and tried her best. One reason I put this off for so long is because I know how much pain it will cause her. She has been sad since she found out I wasn’t “saved”, since she believes I’m going to Hell, which is not a sadness for which I am responsible. That was never going to change, and presumably she believes the state of my physical body is much less important than the state of my soul. Still, I cannot intellectually justify this decision, knowing how much it will hurt her. Maybe my ability to take my own life, knowing how much pain it will cause, shows that I am a monster who doesn’t deserve to live. All I know is that I can’t deal with this pain any longer and I’m am truly sorry I couldn’t wait until my family and everyone I knew died so this could be done without hurting anyone. For years I’ve wished that I’d be hit by a bus or die while saving a baby from drowning so my death might be more acceptable, but I was never so lucky.

—-

To those of you who have shown me love, thank you for putting up with all my shittiness and moodiness and arbitrariness. I was never the person I wanted to be. Maybe without the darkness I would have been a better person, maybe not. I did try to be a good person, but I realize I never got very far.

I’m sorry for the pain this causes. I really do wish I had another option. I hope this letter explains why I needed to do this. If you can’t understand this decision, I hope you can at least forgive me.

Bill Zeller

—-

Please save this letter and repost it if gets deleted. I don’t want people to wonder why I did this. I disseminated it more widely than I might have otherwise because I’m worried that my family might try to restrict access to it. I don’t mind if this letter is made public. In fact, I’d prefer it be made public to people being unable to read it and drawing their own conclusions.

Feel free to republish this letter, but only if it is reproduced in its entirety.

The Daily Princetonian published an article with more information about Bill’s death. And you can also see what friends are saying about him at 1,000 Memories.

Here’s to you Bill. I hope you finally found the peace you were looking for.

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Here is a quote taken directly from her Facebook page:

Assange is not a “journalist,” any more than the “editor” of al Qaeda’s new English-language magazine Inspire is a “journalist.” He is an anti-American operative with blood on his hands. His past posting of classified documents revealed the identity of more than 100 Afghan sources to the Taliban. Why was he not pursued with the same urgency we pursue al Qaeda and Taliban leaders?

Before I go on, let me say that I would also have posted the documents if they were given to me. And for one very good reason. Believe me when I tell you – if I can get my hands on them much, much worse people can too! So whatever the information is, it needs to be acted on immediately. But in fairness, I’d give those affected advance notice before posting it so they could take proactive steps to move people out of harms way.

Incidentally, this model works well in the realm of Cybersecurity. When ethical hackers discover holes in Microsoft or other system security they notify the company first and give them reasonable time to patch the problem before making it public. This ensures that companies have a chance to fix an issue before every amateur in the world is aware of the exploit, but keeps them honest by forcing them to actually fix it! Because it’s likely that some unethical criminals are already aware of the problem and taking advantage of it.

Anyway, getting back to the story at hand, after Sarah Palin essentially advocated using US Government resources to commit crimes in order to silence Assange, on December 21, 2010 she turned around and used information from the very documents she wants to hunt him down for as evidence in a USA Today column that she was allowed to publish:

We suspected this before, but now we know for sure because of leaked diplomatic cables. King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia “frequently exhorted the U.S. to attack Iran to put an end to its nuclear weapons program,” according to these communications.

What’s the point? Its quite simple. In the US we have a legal doctrine often referred to as “fruit from the poison tree“. It essentially prevents the government from using illegally obtained information to prosecute people. So since Palin is so interested in defending individual liberties I think she’s got to choose a side:

• Skewer Assange for leaking documents that were obtained illegally and make some sort of a moral stand for protecting them, then refuse to read them or use anything contained within for any reason whatsoever.
• Applaud Assange for enlightening the world with the documents he posted, and then go through them with a fine toothed comb and use the information contained within them in any way you see fit.

I just find it incredibly hypocritical for her to viscously attack him, and then turn around and use what he provided to help her further her own points in later arguments. Don’t you?

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Here’s a little video introduction to explain what this is all about:

In less than 24 hours we have nearly 1,000 members! In fact, we were averaging over 100 new members per hour for most of the working hours of the day, so thanks to everyone for joining and supporting the community!

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• The Blogging & New Media Report online magazine, a $97 value – free
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So, if you are a WordPress user, head on over to WPUA.org and join the WordPress User Association!

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How Liquid Glass Works

Coffee Cup Treated with Liquid Glass

Since they claim the coating is heat resistant to 450 degrees Celsius (842 degrees Fahrenheit), you could actually coat your grill with it, or the engine of your car, to keep them shiny and clean since they are exposed outdoors. I guess you could also treat most cookware since they rarely get used above that temperature.

According to the company:

Intelligent surface coating from Quantum LiquiGlas® is based on ultra thin layering technology. In essence the technology allows us to deposit a nano scale layer of molecular, particle free glass, on the surface of most surfaces. The molecules of glass (silicon dioxide) come from pure quartz sand, which is one of the most abundant substances on the planet.

Just like domestic glass the coatings are chemically inert and resistant to acid, alkali and solvents; however Quantum LiquiGlas® is also stunningly different. It is flexible, breathable, highly durable, anti microbial and has non stick characteristics.

The application of the Quantum LiquiGlas® coating is very straight forward. 
After pre-cleaning, the coating can be applied in seconds to the newly cleaned surface. Items coated with the ethanol based liquids can be used within minutes.

Since they say it’s harmless to humans, I wonder how long it will be before swimmers start greasing up their bodies with Liquid Glass before hopping in the water? I mean, you know they are going to coat boats and things like that since this will reduce their drag signifigantly…

Big question is… how long does the coating last?

The treatments are all very durable and they will last for many months or even years. We expect the hard surface coatings to last for at least 6 months in domestic environments.

Anyway, here is a little coverage from Reuters. Personally, if this stuff is for real, I’m going to by gallons of it and coat everythign I own. Hopefully we won’t find out a few years later that it causes cancer, or testicular shrinkage, or something like that.

Of course, the prankster in me imagines doing all sorts of stuff with this new treatment:

Towel Treated with Liquid Glass

• Spray it on your little brother’s notebook so whenever he tries to write on it the ink won’t stick!
• Douse your roommate’s towel with liquid glass. Let’s see you dry off now!
• Spray it on a squeegee. Would glass on glass actually work?

The problem with this kind of invention is that one of two things usually happen:

1. The product turns out to be a sham
2. The manufacturer never actually gets the product into the hands of the consumer

If you think about it, as great as this product could be, it would take massive scale production to get it into the hands of all the consumers who would want it. Which is like… every single person on the planet. So they are either going to have to build some unbelievably large facilities or they are going to have to partner with large consumer products companies through a licensing deal.

Anyway, I’d love for this story to be true, and I’d love to believe that they are beginning to ship it early next year… but forgive me for being a skeptic.

What would you do with it if you could get your hands on some Liquid Glass?

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And by the way, the Chinese aren’t putting up crappy buildings that you wouldn’t want to be caught dead in! Just take a look at the amazing buildings Trey Ratcliff captured on his recent trip to China over on StuckInCustoms.com.

Anyway, here is the description from Yahoo News on this new building:

The work crew erected the hotel — a soundproofed, thermal-insulated structure reportedly built to withstand a magnitude 9 earthquake — with all prefabricated materials. In other words, a crew of off-site factory workers built the sections, and their on-site counterparts arranged them on the foundation for the Ark project.

Despite the frenetic pace of construction, no workers were injured — and thanks to the prefab nature of the process, the builders wasted very few construction materials. Below is a time-lapse video that shows the hotel being built from the ground up in less than a week:

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What happened? Neal’s wife, Cali Lewis, decided to leave him. And when she did, my wife and I eventually took her side. And as far as Neal is concerned, that is reason to “rebuke you in the name of Jesus”. Yep. He did that to at least three or four people I know of as soon as they questioned what he was telling them about the whole mess.

It Didn’t Have To Be This Way

Neal and Cali had problems. Lots of people do. And sometimes marriages fail. Actually over half of marriages end in divorce according to Jennifer Baker. (Here’s the report: Half of Marriages End in Divorce).

Cali had a number of what I would consider to be extremely valid reasons for leaving (ie- I’d bet $1M you’d leave too…), and after she did Neal immediately acknowledged his faults to a number of people including myself, but then later began withdrawing his admissions and shifting blame.

Had Neal continued to accept his responsibility and taken steps to change, as far as I can tell, he would have still ended up divorced – but he would have been able to maintain some sort of a relationship with Cali, he would have been able to continue to work with her (likely on GeekBrief.TV) and the core group of people around the two of them would have continued to support him and be there for him.

But within 2-3 weeks he completely changed his position and decided that none of it was his fault, and everything was mine.

Let the Beatings Begin

As far as I can tell when Neal decides you are no longer useful – you become the enemy. At the beginning we conversed via chat and email. I told him that I would help both him and Cali. And he admitted that he was to blame. But while we chatted he also wanted to use me to convince Cali to come back to him. Or meet with him somewhere. When I refused to try and intercede on his behalf, he turned against me.

Neal Calls Me Satanic - Sep 4, 2010 at ~1:45 am

Over the coming weeks, and then months, Neal acted with conviction and malice to try and convince anyone who would listen to him that Cali had “abandoned God”, and that I was the primary cause of it. He called me evil, satanic, and a number of other things – and his insults were always sharpest in the early morning.

Why Would He Do That?

I don’t know. I can understand that going through a separation or divorce would be a very emotional time. I can even understand being angry and blaming people. But it is not rational to lash out publicly, and often, especially when the people whom you have decided to attack know all of your terrible secrets.

And why would a person take this sort of attack onto the Internet and do it in front of thousands of people on Twitter and Facebook? Was it some sort of a pre-emptive attack designed to undermine the integrity of the people who could share the full truth of the situation to the world?

Personally I would have thought that silence would be the best course of action, as opposed to starting a war. But I’m not Neal. And I guess in the middle of all this mess Neal forgot that I’m not the kind of person who would ever tolerate his attacks.

But Why Did You Sue Him?

1. Neal defamed me repeatedly for nearly a year both privately and to an audience of literally thousands of people on Twitter and Facebook. Although I have refrained from responding out of respect for Cali I will no longer ignore the attacks. I am further convinced that Neal will never stop unless forced to.
2. We may live in a free society, but individual free speech has limits. I’d be fine with Neal telling the world that he hates me, or calling me names; but when one person maliciously spreads lies in order to damage another’s reputation someone has to put an end to it.
3. Lets face it, the fact that I didn’t fight back is viewed by some people as taking the high road, but by others a long and sustained silence is tanamount to an admission of guilt. My silence has come to an end.

He’s No Saint

If you head over to Neal’s blog, or his Twitter account, or Facebook page virtually all you will see is talk of religion. He would have you believe he is the most faithful, God-fearing, community oriented Christian you’ve ever met – though I dare you to disagree with him about anything (literally, anything). And then see what happens.

If you go back and read his posts you will also see him repeatedly claiming that what he wants is to have Cali back, to go to marriage counseling, to save her from me, etc. Yet exactly one week after their divorce was finalized he told Cali that he is engaged and getting married again and would like her blessing! This can only mean that all of his public grief was merely an act designed to maximize sympathy for his position while he was obviously perfectly happy with whomever is now his fiance.

Well, Neal is an amazing actor but I’ve compiled an absolute moutain of evidence that demonstrates his sustained, malicious and attacking behavior which has been going on the entire time he professes to be pursuing his Christian ideals. And on top of that, I’ve got witnesses who are more than happy to share their personal stories of betrayal. Hopefully some of them will even chime in here…

In this instance, my attorneys assure me that we have an open and shut case of libel per se. And I’m looking forward to finally getting the full story on record in a court of law.

Ok, But Why Break the Silence and Post This Now?

Neal’s whereabouts are literally unknown. As far as we know, he moved in with whomever he is planning on marrying and has been living with her for a while. But no one knows where that is, so I don’t have an address to have him served at.

Since I promised Neal long ago that if he ever angered me enough to do something about it I would let him know in no uncertain terms, I thought it only fair to make sure he is aware that he has actually been sued so that he can answer the suit rather than skipping our court date and just having a summary judgement issued against him.

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