“We are a way for the universe to know itself.” – Carl Sagan

This quote is perhaps one of the most important that I have ever heard. I had heard it many times and even understood it as a boy but, not until the past few years did I truly come to comprehend what it meant.

Hidden in this brief line of eloquence was a profound observation of our universe that encompassed everything from astrophysics to what it means to be human.

A Popular View

Image courtesy of xkcd.com

I am an atheist. Depending on the socio-cultural circles that you move in, you may not care for that statement very much or, you may be pleased to hear it. It does not define me entirely as a person but, it is a very important aspect of who I am and how I approach the world. When I say that I am an atheist, a popular image of me is immediately cast in the minds of many people; that of a cynical, mean-spirited and, immoral science zealot. I was recently told by a family friend that it is not possible to be a skeptical person and maintain a healthy imagination because, someone who is constantly questioning and looking for empirical evidence of everything will miss the loftier human angles of the question.

Essentially the sentiment was that if I am not willing to take things at face value then I will never understand the warmth, wonder and, magic of the human experience. I could launch into a tirade here about how this represents a false dichotomy and demonstrate that the two are not mutually exclusive but, I feel that my point may be better served by presenting my position in a deeper, warmer and, more human manner.

In the Beginning

Image courtesy of WikiCommons.

Our universe is infinitely beautiful in its intricacies. It exists as an ever changing, ever deepening well of information for us. On the surface, it functions according to natural laws that describe how its contents exist and interact with each other. These laws, in an intriguing mirror of the things that they describe, seem to break down into infinite minutia.

After the ‘Big Bang’ these laws would eventually produce great, glowing objects known to us as stars. At the heart of these stars, hydrogen atoms would fuse together and create new atoms of carbon, oxygen and, helium as well as all other heavy elements in the universe. By the function of the natural laws that governed them, these stars would eventually run out of fuel, swell to a great size and explode in what truly must be the most beautiful of sights.

They would cast the fruits of their grand labor into the depths of the void. Across the universe, some of these atoms would meet and coalesce due to their mass.  Over the millennia these atoms would form larger objects with more mass and more pull; swirling together in a chaotic, violent and, beautiful dance.

Over time these object would become the planets that orbit the multitude stars of our universe. By the natural laws some would settle into a comfortable and delicate orbit around a warm and welcoming star. Over time some of these atoms, in the presence of others, on a fledgling planet would begin to form molecules. Due to the laws of chemistry, these molecules, under the right conditions, would begin to recreate themselves from the matter around them.

These new molecules would eventually form nuclei and become the first cells, which would then divide themselves and form small multi-cellular organisms.

The universe has just created life.

This was not predestined or made to occur. It simply happened as a natural function of the universe’s existence. These organisms would reproduce and evolve; improving upon themselves with each successive generation. The combined forces of the natural laws would blindly select the best of these offspring to survive and reproduce, ensuring that they would be able to sustain and grow.

Their dead would nourish the planet, providing their stored energies to other organisms. These organisms would soon evolve further and differentiate, creating by their very existence, new laws that would govern themselves. Some would be predators, feeding off of each other and, some would be prey, feeding off of vegetative life; all in a fragile balance of power. The strongest of these would, by their nature and the delicate hand of natural selection, reproduce and evolve.

Some would rise above others in the chain of life and begin to evolve more rapidly. They would soon develop the ability to consider and understand. The eyes and hands that they evolved would feed them information about the nature of their existence. As they would gain more information they would gain more understanding.

The universe has just learned to see and feel.

It has become sentient due to the very nature of its existence. It has become able to consider itself and to understand itself; able to marvel at itself… through us. We are literally born of the stars that were themselves born of the moment in time when all matter began to exist and, it is very probable that each of us contains at least one atom that was created during the birth of the universe.

I am an atheist and a skeptic. I do not put stock in fantastical concepts of magical beings that created all we see. I believe in verifiable evidence and the natural laws of our universe. This does not make me dispassionate. I look at the reality of our universe and my heart swells to imagine it. I can think of no higher place, no greater knowledge, than knowing that I am a child of the stars and a way for our universe to look upon itself and weep with joy at its own magnificence.

None Found

I KNOW you’ve been hassled by beggars about 100 times at least in your life. And nothing drives me crazier than people standing around begging. I absolutely NEVER give them money.

So, do you think that makes me an a-hole? Because I’m not. I’ve donated more to charity than most people will in a lifetime. What it makes me is not a sucker.

Let Me Explain

The following series is a set of photographs of some beggars in China. A reporter followed them around and took pictures of them at work.

At first we see a man who appears to be practically near death being cared for by his loving wife. So many people feel bad for them and stop to help.

After a little while, they get up to move to another location.

Here they are, back at work again.

After a while, I guess they have to set something up for their next score?

Then they are on the move again.

This time, to grab a decent meal before they go “back to work”.

I know, you’re thinking this is not common, right? WRONG!

Video Proof

Here are two different stories from the US of undercover TV reporters documenting the reality behind begging and panhandling in America. If you do a search, you’ll find plenty more!

How to Be a Great Beggar

Now, a video that tells you everything you need to get out there and start earning today! Just trade in your dignity for some cold hard cash.

Bottom Line

So, what’s the bottom line here? Did you hear the lady who works for the homeless shelter tell you – do not give panhandlers money? I mean that kind of says it all. But hopefully you now understand why.

I know that when you see them your mind is racing. “I wonder what’s wrong? How did they get that way? I feel sorry for them.” But as long as you are aware that they are working hard to engineer that response from you, you can resist it!

People who start begging become addicted to the easy cash, and very rapidly stop even trying to accomplish any noble goal they had before they started. So next time, just ignore them or tell them you only donate to national charities.

None Found

About a week ago, a group of people filed a lawsuit in New York to prevent a cross from being erected within the World Trade Center memorial without equal opportunity for other religions who wish to have memorials there as well.

According to the lawsuit, among the 2,792 people killed in the twin towers, 31 were Muslim Americans, approximately 400 to 500 were Jewish Americans, approximately 500 were non-religious Americans, and an unknown number were Americans of other faiths. (So, about half of the people who died were not Christian.)

Additionally:

No other religious or non-religious group has been permitted a memorial.

Fox News had some discussions about this event including this one.

Fox News on the WTC Cross Lawsuit

Clearly Christians are angry. They later had Blair Scott, Communications Director for American Atheists, on a show to talk about the lawsuit and immediately the Fox News Facebook page was flooded with thousands of comments. I would link to the post, but apparently Fox removed it. Not before several comments were screen captured though.

Keep in mind, this blog post is not about whether or not the Cross or any other religious things should be allowed at the WTC Memorial, which incidentally is mostly funded with hundreds of millions of dollars of US taxpayer money from people of all religions, including non-religious people.

What it is about however is the swift, brutal and violently extreme comments that self-professed Christians made immediately following Blair Scott’s appearance to express his views on Fox TV.

Facebook Christians Advocating Death, Rape and Harm to Athiests

The list below represents just some of the comments that were captured before the content was deleted. Each commentator’s name is linked to their Facebook profile if it can be found, along with the quote attributed to that person. (If you find an inaccuracy or omission please let me know.)

Paul Altum

i say kill them all and let them see for themselves that there is God

Bob O’Connell

Shoot them. Shoot to kill.

Joe Martinez

To ALL ATHEIEST DIE AN GO TO HELL HAHA IF I COULD ID SHOOT ALL OF YOU IN THE HEAD WITH A 12GUAGE

Joseph Sneckenberg

thats easy shoot them

Casey M Jones

Shoot em. At least we know where they’re going, waste of oxygen

Mike Holeschek

Nail them to the cross then display it.

Chris Dunn

I thinly we should hang the leader of that group on the cross with nails through their hands and feet, place a crown of thorns upon their head, RAM a spear through their side all after being whipped and beaten publicly! Just so they can endure what Christ dod so they understand the sacrifice behind what that cross symbolizes.

Bob O’Connell

They’re atheists so it won’t matter if you kill them.

Tim Allison

KILL THEM.

Richard Silvia

someone show me where they live&and they will live no mere!

Raylene Ingmire

Here’s my solution, kill the group..just kidding, you figure it out. I’m so sick of people that pick and choose when they want to truly be American. They can go to Hell oh wait they will.

Sindy Clock

stupid atheists, I hope God kills them all.

Sindy Clock

I love Jesus, and the cross and if you dont, I hope someone rapes you!

Eileen Rourke

Any court or lawyer who takes this case should be hung!!!! If you look at some of the people who are atheists they are all miserable looking because they don’t have any faith in anything. You should all go live in another country. You have taken enough of my rights away.

Hans Anderson

atheist has no rights a snail has more rights than a atheist has I say throw them out to the sharks let them eat them like the ate bin laden

Michael Perri

these people are f’ing scum of the earth. can we start killing them now? few groups are filled with more hatred than atheists.

Scott Miller

IF THE CROSS OFFENDS YOU: SO SHOULD THIS COUNTRY; LEAVE BEFORE WE KILL YOU!!!!

Patrick Alley

Kill em all…let God sort em out. Guess what Atheists…

So, What Do You Think?

There have also been a lot of Tweets related to this issue, but I’m really wondering what YOU think about it?

• Christians, is it really acceptable to say, “I’m not like them. Those aren’t real Christians!” After all, the people who made these comments would say the exact same thing about you.
• Non-Christian people who identify with another religion, do you think your religion should be able to display a memorial to the believers who died alongside the Christians?
• Non-believers, is it really so important to warrant a national campaign to not allow a single Christian symbol at a monument for the dead?

I am DYING to hear what you guys think…

None Found

Bill Zeller was a PhD Candidate at the Center for Information Technology Policy, which is part of Princeton University‘s Computer Science program. Last Sunday he took his own life and left a detailed suicide note explaining his rationale. If you’d like to learn a little more about Bill, you can visit his personal site (for as long as it remains up), read his Twitter stream, and see his Flickr gallery.

Although the outward signs of Zeller’s life might seem normal enough, he was apparently battling a raging fire of torment inside caused by sexual abuse as a child. Something he shared with no one until his death. It goes to show you how terrible that kind of abuse can be, and what should be done to the perpetrators.

It also raises the questions about the morality of suicide. As Bill puts it:

“People say suicide is selfish. I think it’s selfish to ask people to continue living painful and miserable lives, just so you possibly won’t feel sad for a week or two. Suicide may be a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but it’s also a permanent solution to a ~23 year-old problem that grows more intense and overwhelming every day.”

Personally, I believe that people should be able to not only determine how they want to live their life, but also how they want to end it. It reminds me of the story of the elderly British couple who committed suicide together.

And now, the final message from Bill Zeller (set aside some time, its over 4,000 words):

I have the urge to declare my sanity and justify my actions, but I assume I’ll never be able to convince anyone that this was the right decision. Maybe it’s true that anyone who does this is insane by definition, but I can at least explain my reasoning. I considered not writing any of this because of how personal it is, but I like tying up loose ends and don’t want people to wonder why I did this. Since I’ve never spoken to anyone about what happened to me, people would likely draw the wrong conclusions.

My first memories as a child are of being raped, repeatedly. This has affected every aspect of my life. This darkness, which is the only way I can describe it, has followed me like a fog, but at times intensified and overwhelmed me, usually triggered by a distinct situation. In kindergarten I couldn’t use the bathroom and would stand petrified whenever I needed to, which started a trend of awkward and unexplained social behavior. The damage that was done to my body still prevents me from using the bathroom normally, but now it’s less of a physical impediment than a daily reminder of what was done to me.

This darkness followed me as I grew up. I remember spending hours playing with legos, having my world consist of me and a box of cold, plastic blocks. Just waiting for everything to end. It’s the same thing I do now, but instead of legos it’s surfing the web or reading or listening to a baseball game. Most of my life has been spent feeling dead inside, waiting for my body to catch up.

At times growing up I would feel inconsolable rage, but I never connected this to what happened until puberty. I was able to keep the darkness at bay for a few hours at a time by doing things that required intense concentration, but it would always come back. Programming appealed to me for this reason. I was never particularly fond of computers or mathematically inclined, but the temporary peace it would provide was like a drug. But the darkness always returned and built up something like a tolerance, because programming has become less and less of a refuge.

The darkness is with me nearly every time I wake up. I feel like a grime is covering me. I feel like I’m trapped in a contimated body that no amount of washing will clean. Whenever I think about what happened I feel manic and itchy and can’t concentrate on anything else. It manifests itself in hours of eating or staying up for days at a time or sleeping for sixteen hours straight or week long programming binges or constantly going to the gym. I’m exhausted from feeling like this every hour of every day.

Three to four nights a week I have nightmares about what happened. It makes me avoid sleep and constantly tired, because sleeping with what feels like hours of nightmares is not restful. I wake up sweaty and furious. I’m reminded every morning of what was done to me and the control it has over my life.

I’ve never been able to stop thinking about what happened to me and this hampered my social interactions. I would be angry and lost in thought and then be interrupted by someone saying “Hi” or making small talk, unable to understand why I seemed cold and distant. I walked around, viewing the outside world from a distant portal behind my eyes, unable to perform normal human niceties. I wondered what it would be like to take to other people without what happened constantly on my mind, and I wondered if other people had similar experiences that they were better able to mask.

Alcohol was also something that let me escape the darkness. It would always find me later, though, and it was always angry that I managed to escape and it made me pay. Many of the irresponsible things I did were the result of the darkness. Obviously I’m responsible for every decision and action, including this one, but there are reasons why things happen the way they do.

Alcohol and other drugs provided a way to ignore the realities of my situation. It was easy to spend the night drinking and forget that I had no future to look forward to. I never liked what alcohol did to me, but it was better than facing my existence honestly. I haven’t touched alcohol or any other drug in over seven months (and no drugs or alcohol will be involved when I do this) and this has forced me to evaluate my life in an honest and clear way. There’s no future here. The darkness will always be with me.

I used to think if I solved some problem or achieved some goal, maybe he would leave. It was comforting to identify tangible issues as the source of my problems instead of something that I’ll never be able to change. I thought that if I got into to a good college, or a good grad school, or lost weight, or went to the gym nearly every day for a year, or created programs that millions of people used, or spent a summer or California or New York or published papers that I was proud of, then maybe I would feel some peace and not be constantly haunted and unhappy. But nothing I did made a dent in how depressed I was on a daily basis and nothing was in any way fulfilling. I’m not sure why I ever thought that would change anything.

I didn’t realize how deep a hold he had on me and my life until my first relationship. I stupidly assumed that no matter how the darkness affected me personally, my romantic relationships would somehow be separated and protected. Growing up I viewed my future relationships as a possible escape from this thing that haunts me every day, but I began to realize how entangled it was with every aspect of my life and how it is never going to release me. Instead of being an escape, relationships and romantic contact with other people only intensified everything about him that I couldn’t stand. I will never be able to have a relationship in which he is not the focus, affecting every aspect of my romantic interactions.

Relationships always started out fine and I’d be able to ignore him for a few weeks. But as we got closer emotionally the darkness would return and every night it’d be me, her and the darkness in a black and gruesome threesome. He would surround me and penetrate me and the more we did the more intense it became. It made me hate being touched, because as long as we were separated I could view her like an outsider viewing something good and kind and untainted. Once we touched, the darkness would envelope her too and take her over and the evil inside me would surround her. I always felt like I was infecting anyone I was with.

Relationships didn’t work. No one I dated was the right match, and I thought that maybe if I found the right person it would overwhelm him. Part of me knew that finding the right person wouldn’t help, so I became interested in girls who obviously had no interest in me. For a while I thought I was gay. I convinced myself that it wasn’t the darkness at all, but rather my orientation, because this would give me control over why things didn’t feel “right”. The fact that the darkness affected sexual matters most intensely made this idea make some sense and I convinced myself of this for a number of years, starting in college after my first relationship ended. I told people I was gay (at Trinity, not at Princeton), even though I wasn’t attracted to men and kept finding myself interested in girls. Because if being gay wasn’t the answer, then what was? People thought I was avoiding my orientation, but I was actually avoiding the truth, which is that while I’m straight, I will never be content with anyone. I know now that the darkness will never leave.

Last spring I met someone who was unlike anyone else I’d ever met. Someone who showed me just how well two people could get along and how much I could care about another human being. Someone I know I could be with and love for the rest of my life, if I weren’t so fucked up. Amazingly, she liked me. She liked the shell of the man the darkness had left behind. But it didn’t matter because I couldn’t be alone with her. It was never just the two of us, it was always the three of us: her, me and the darkness. The closer we got, the more intensely I’d feel the darkness, like some evil mirror of my emotions. All the closeness we had and I loved was complemented by agony that I couldn’t stand, from him. I realized that I would never be able to give her, or anyone, all of me or only me. She could never have me without the darkness and evil inside me. I could never have just her, without the darkness being a part of all of our interactions. I will never be able to be at peace or content or in a healthy relationship. I realized the futility of the romantic part of my life. If I had never met her, I would have realized this as soon as I met someone else who I meshed similarly well with. It’s likely that things wouldn’t have worked out with her and we would have broken up (with our relationship ending, like the majority of relationships do) even if I didn’t have this problem, since we only dated for a short time. But I will face exactly the same problems with the darkness with anyone else. Despite my hopes, love and compatability is not enough. Nothing is enough. There’s no way I can fix this or even push the darkness down far enough to make a relationship or any type of intimacy feasible.

So I watched as things fell apart between us. I had put an explicit time limit on our relationship, since I knew it couldn’t last because of the darkness and didn’t want to hold her back, and this caused a variety of problems. She was put in an unnatural situation that she never should have been a part of. It must have been very hard for her, not knowing what was actually going on with me, but this is not something I’ve ever been able to talk about with anyone. Losing her was very hard for me as well. Not because of her (I got over our relationship relatively quickly), but because of the realization that I would never have another relationship and because it signified the last true, exclusive personal connection I could ever have. This wasn’t apparent to other people, because I could never talk about the real reasons for my sadness. I was very sad in the summer and fall, but it was not because of her, it was because I will never escape the darkness with anyone. She was so loving and kind to me and gave me everything I could have asked for under the circumstances. I’ll never forget how much happiness she brought me in those briefs moments when I could ignore the darkness. I had originally planned to kill myself last winter but never got around to it. (Parts of this letter were written over a year ago, other parts days before doing this.) It was wrong of me to involve myself in her life if this were a possibility and I should have just left her alone, even though we only dated for a few months and things ended a long time ago. She’s just one more person in a long list of people I’ve hurt.

I could spend pages talking about the other relationships I’ve had that were ruined because of my problems and my confusion related to the darkness. I’ve hurt so many great people because of who I am and my inability to experience what needs to be experienced. All I can say is that I tried to be honest with people about what I thought was true.

I’ve spent my life hurting people. Today will be the last time.

I’ve told different people a lot of things, but I’ve never told anyone about what happened to me, ever, for obvious reasons. It took me a while to realize that no matter how close you are to someone or how much they claim to love you, people simply cannot keep secrets. I learned this a few years ago when I thought I was gay and told people. The more harmful the secret, the juicier the gossip and the more likely you are to be betrayed. People don’t care about their word or what they’ve promised, they just do whatever the fuck they want and justify it later. It feels incredibly lonely to realize you can never share something with someone and have it be between just the two of you. I don’t blame anyone in particular, I guess it’s just how people are. Even if I felt like this is something I could have shared, I have no interest in being part of a friendship or relationship where the other person views me as the damaged and contaminated person that I am. So even if I were able to trust someone, I probably would not have told them about what happened to me. At this point I simply don’t care who knows.

I feel an evil inside me. An evil that makes me want to end life. I need to stop this. I need to make sure I don’t kill someone, which is not something that can be easily undone. I don’t know if this is related to what happened to me or something different. I recognize the irony of killing myself to prevent myself from killing someone else, but this decision should indicate what I’m capable of.

So I’ve realized I will never escape the darkness or misery associated with it and I have a responsibility to stop myself from physically harming others.

I’m just a broken, miserable shell of a human being. Being molested has defined me as a person and shaped me as a human being and it has made me the monster I am and there’s nothing I can do to escape it. I don’t know any other existence. I don’t know what life feels like where I’m apart from any of this. I actively despise the person I am. I just feel fundamentally broken, almost non-human. I feel like an animal that woke up one day in a human body, trying to make sense of a foreign world, living among creatures it doesn’t understand and can’t connect with.

I have accepted that the darkness will never allow me to be in a relationship. I will never go to sleep with someone in my arms, feeling the comfort of their hands around me. I will never know what uncontimated intimacy is like. I will never have an exclusive bond with someone, someone who can be the recipient of all the love I have to give. I will never have children, and I wanted to be a father so badly. I think I would have made a good dad. And even if I had fought through the darkness and married and had children all while being unable to feel intimacy, I could have never done that if suicide were a possibility. I did try to minimize pain, although I know that this decision will hurt many of you. If this hurts you, I hope that you can at least forget about me quickly.

There’s no point in identifying who molested me, so I’m just going to leave it at that. I doubt the word of a dead guy with no evidence about something that happened over twenty years ago would have much sway.

You may wonder why I didn’t just talk to a professional about this. I’ve seen a number of doctors since I was a teenager to talk about other issues and I’m positive that another doctor would not have helped. I was never given one piece of actionable advice, ever. More than a few spent a large part of the session reading their notes to remember who I was. And I have no interest in talking about being raped as a child, both because I know it wouldn’t help and because I have no confidence it would remain secret. I know the legal and practical limits of doctor/patient confidentiality, growing up in a house where we’d hear stories about the various mental illnesses of famous people, stories that were passed down through generations. All it takes is one doctor who thinks my story is interesting enough to share or a doctor who thinks it’s her right or responsibility to contact the authorities and have me identify the molestor (justifying her decision by telling herself that someone else might be in danger). All it takes is a single doctor who violates my trust, just like the “friends” who I told I was gay did, and everything would be made public and I’d be forced to live in a world where people would know how fucked up I am. And yes, I realize this indicates that I have severe trust issues, but they’re based on a large number of experiences with people who have shown a profound disrepect for their word and the privacy of others.

People say suicide is selfish. I think it’s selfish to ask people to continue living painful and miserable lives, just so you possibly won’t feel sad for a week or two. Suicide may be a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but it’s also a permanent solution to a ~23 year-old problem that grows more intense and overwhelming every day.

Some people are just dealt bad hands in this life. I know many people have it worse than I do, and maybe I’m just not a strong person, but I really did try to deal with this. I’ve tried to deal with this every day for the last 23 years and I just can’t fucking take it anymore.

I often wonder what life must be like for other people. People who can feel the love from others and give it back unadulterated, people who can experience sex as an intimate and joyous experience, people who can experience the colors and happenings of this world without constant misery. I wonder who I’d be if things had been different or if I were a stronger person. It sounds pretty great.

I’m prepared for death. I’m prepared for the pain and I am ready to no longer exist. Thanks to the strictness of New Jersey gun laws this will probably be much more painful than it needs to be, but what can you do. My only fear at this point is messing something up and surviving.

—-

I’d also like to address my family, if you can call them that. I despise everything they stand for and I truly hate them, in a non-emotional, dispassionate and what I believe is a healthy way. The world will be a better place when they’re dead—one with less hatred and intolerance.

If you’re unfamiliar with the situation, my parents are fundamentalist Christians who kicked me out of their house and cut me off financially when I was 19 because I refused to attend seven hours of church a week.

They live in a black and white reality they’ve constructed for themselves. They partition the world into good and evil and survive by hating everything they fear or misunderstand and calling it love. They don’t understand that good and decent people exist all around us, “saved” or not, and that evil and cruel people occupy a large percentage of their church. They take advantage of people looking for hope by teaching them to practice the same hatred they practice.

A random example:

“I am personally convinced that if a Muslim truly believes and obeys the Koran, he will be a terrorist.” – George Zeller, August 24, 2010.

If you choose to follow a religion where, for example, devout Catholics who are trying to be good people are all going to Hell but child molestors go to Heaven (as long as they were “saved” at some point), that’s your choice, but it’s fucked up. Maybe a God who operates by those rules does exist. If so, fuck Him.

Their church was always more important than the members of their family and they happily sacrificed whatever necessary in order to satisfy their contrived beliefs about who they should be.

I grew up in a house where love was proxied through a God I could never believe in. A house where the love of music with any sort of a beat was literally beaten out of me. A house full of hatred and intolerance, run by two people who were experts at appearing kind and warm when others were around. Parents who tell an eight year old that his grandmother is going to Hell because she’s Catholic. Parents who claim not to be racist but then talk about the horrors of miscegenation. I could list hundreds of other examples, but it’s tiring.

Since being kicked out, I’ve interacted with them in relatively normal ways. I talk to them on the phone like nothing happened. I’m not sure why. Maybe because I like pretending I have a family. Maybe I like having people I can talk to about what’s been going on in my life. Whatever the reason, it’s not real and it feels like a sham. I should have never allowed this reconnection to happen.

I wrote the above a while ago, and I do feel like that much of the time. At other times, though, I feel less hateful. I know my parents honestly believe the crap they believe in. I know that my mom, at least, loved me very much and tried her best. One reason I put this off for so long is because I know how much pain it will cause her. She has been sad since she found out I wasn’t “saved”, since she believes I’m going to Hell, which is not a sadness for which I am responsible. That was never going to change, and presumably she believes the state of my physical body is much less important than the state of my soul. Still, I cannot intellectually justify this decision, knowing how much it will hurt her. Maybe my ability to take my own life, knowing how much pain it will cause, shows that I am a monster who doesn’t deserve to live. All I know is that I can’t deal with this pain any longer and I’m am truly sorry I couldn’t wait until my family and everyone I knew died so this could be done without hurting anyone. For years I’ve wished that I’d be hit by a bus or die while saving a baby from drowning so my death might be more acceptable, but I was never so lucky.

—-

To those of you who have shown me love, thank you for putting up with all my shittiness and moodiness and arbitrariness. I was never the person I wanted to be. Maybe without the darkness I would have been a better person, maybe not. I did try to be a good person, but I realize I never got very far.

I’m sorry for the pain this causes. I really do wish I had another option. I hope this letter explains why I needed to do this. If you can’t understand this decision, I hope you can at least forgive me.

Bill Zeller

—-

Please save this letter and repost it if gets deleted. I don’t want people to wonder why I did this. I disseminated it more widely than I might have otherwise because I’m worried that my family might try to restrict access to it. I don’t mind if this letter is made public. In fact, I’d prefer it be made public to people being unable to read it and drawing their own conclusions.

Feel free to republish this letter, but only if it is reproduced in its entirety.

The Daily Princetonian published an article with more information about Bill’s death. And you can also see what friends are saying about him at 1,000 Memories.

Here’s to you Bill. I hope you finally found the peace you were looking for.

None Found

Last week I came across what sounded like a neat little Twitter contest that Mercedes Benz was running. As a Mercedes owner I took an interest when I saw that they were looking for people who were willing to drive a Mercedes across the country while tweeting for a chance to win a new car plus a couple of tickets to the super bowl.

So, I tossed my name in the hat because it sounded like fun. Lo and behold, I was accepted into what Mercedes referred to as “the Second Round”, in which I was asked to submit an application. At first I was a little excited, though I figured there are probably a million people in the “Second Round” anyway…

THEN I read the actual “application”. And wow, I couldn’t believe what all they were asking for!

What the Contest Promises

Here’s what the official contest tells you before you enter:

Four two-person teams will embark on Feb. 2, 2011, from one of four cities – New York, L.A., Chicago or Tampa – with a pair of Super Bowl tickets and specially outfitted Mercedes-Benz vehicles.

They’ll need to beat out three other teams headed to Dallas. They’ll need to complete a series of challenges along the way. And they’ll need gallons of Tweets from their Twitter followers to fuel them to victory.

If you were “lucky” enough to be chosen for the second round of the contest then you received a Twitter DM (direct message) instructing you to email the contest administrator for your application packet – which I did.

What NOT To Do When Running a Contest

In response, an email arrived with an 8.3MB attached 11 page application. Yes, eleven pages. (BTW, posting this disqualifies me from the contest, but as you’ll see in a minute, it doesn’t matter). A couple of notes for anyone considering running a Twitter contest:

• A lot of people’s email accounts might not accept a 8MB attachment. And even if they do, what if they are traveling or something (which I was)? Why not upload it somewhere and give us a link. Huge surprise attachments are just plain rude, and have been since like 1999.
• You might not want to give people an 11 page application to start with for a freaking contest.

Problems, Problems

Ok, to be honest, even though the 11 page application was a bit of a shocker I was still considering it. But there were two big problems:

1. I received it on December 25, and they required a complete response by December 29. Even taking out the fact that we are talking about the holiday season, the application not only requires written response, but it also requires a photograph with your driving partner as well as a 2 minute video with your partner. I guess they didn’t consider the fact that people might not be in town!
2. MUCH more importantly, this process requires that every applicant submit to an unbelievably invasive background search. I mean that I literally could not believe the nerve of what they were asking for.

The Unbelievable Release

AUTHORIZATION AND RELEASE (driver)
Please print, sign, scan and send completed version to RaceDirectory@MBTweetRace.com

Permission to obtain driver records, employment and education verifications, search for criminal records, litigation, liens, judgments, credit reports, bankruptcy records and all other records reflecting character.

I, ___________________ hereby authorize IPS Associates, LLC to conduct an investigation and/or obtain investgative reports, driver history records, criminal convictions records, credit reports, education, prior employment, character, general reputation, personal characteristics and mode of living.

I hereby authorize IPS Associates, LLC to conduct an education search to verify any enrollment and/or degrees which I have obtained as well as to verify all academics and/or licensses which may be listed below.

I, hereby authorize IPS Associates, LLC to conduct an employment search to verify employment which I have listed below.

I further understand than an investigative consumer report may contain information about my character, general reputation, personal characteristics and mode of living, which information may be obtained through personal interviews with my friends, neighbors and/or other associates.

I further understand that any information obtained by IPS Associates, LLC will not be used in violation of any federal or state discrimination law or regulation.

I hereby and herewith release IPS Associates, LLC, its employees, agents and contractors from any and all liability whatsoever arising from the investigation, report or any decisions made by any person or entity based upon the results of the investgation or report.

Print Name / Sign / etc.

GOOD LORD! They want you to give them your social security number, drivers license, and the right to delve into employment, credit, “…character, general reputation, personal characteristics and mode of living…” and whatever else they like? Oh, and you are going to completely absolve them “…from any and all liability whatsoever….”

So It’s Like a Job and Going to Pay Off, Right?

When I hear all of that I think, this thing better really, really pay off right! NO! According to the competition Terms here is what you get:

Contestants must be available beginning at 9 am on February 1, 2011 through February 9, 2011.

Compensation will not be provided to Contest Teams, including but not limited to, reimbursement for lost wages or business losses. Teams will be provided a daily stipend for food, lodging and gasoline. Travel from the Contestant’s home to the Teams designated race beginning point and from Dallas back to their home will be provided via coach class airline commercial carrier. Contestants must agree to abide by any social media and site rules established by Twitter®, Facebook and Sponsor.

Contestants must agree to abide by all traffic and parking rules and laws. Contestants will be liable for all parking tickets, moving violations or other fines levied in connection with driving the vehicle.

Contestants shall be required to sign a Liability Waiver and Release form to operate the vehicle, and Publicity Release consent to the use of their name, likeness and any and all copyright or other intellectual property rights without compensation, in any advertising and promotional activities, worldwide, in perpetuity.

Lets Examine the Prizes

Both the Winning Driver and the Winning Co-Driver of the winning Contest Team will receive a 2012 Mercedes-Benz C250 Coupe, base model, with winner’s choice of paint color (Prize Vehicles).

Oh, there is one little catch:

Winners of Prize Vehicles acknowledge and accept that the Prize Vehicles will not be available to the winners until model retail launch in October 2011.

Well, and another much bigger catch:

…all federal, state and local taxes associated with the acceptance of any and all prizes connected with this Contest are the sole responsibility of the winner.

To Sum It All Up

So, to wrap it all up for you,

• They ran a “contest” that needs lots of participation, and which is dependant on the social media sphere.
• God only knows how many people’s lives they are going to investigate like crazy to narrow the field to 4 teams.
• 3 out of 4 final teams are going to have to give up a week to compete and get NOTHING!
• You have to accept ALL liability while you are competing for free in their contest!
• They can decide to change the contest prize on you at any time – so you might not even win the car they are holding the contest for!
• If you do win, you aren’t going to get the prize for nearly a year.
• You are signing over your name, likeness, etc. FOREVER for them to use in any way they want GLOBALLY (even if you don’t win and get NOTHING for participating).
• And if you win you’re going to be responsible for paying for taxes on the value of the vehicle as if it was income. So hope you have many $thousands of cash laying around to take care of Uncle Sam.

All of this just puts a really, really bad taste in my mouth for Mercedes Benz. Which of course is the complete opposite of what I suspect they were looking for. Sooo… I have just one question for Mercedes:

Who the hell did you hire to run this contest, and what were you thinking???

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Its a sad day, but one that was destined to come – not because of what I’ve done, but because Neal Campbell has been defaming me for nearly a year and there are no signs that he’s ever going to let up. What makes the story more sad is that Neal is someone I used to consider a friend.

What happened? Neal’s wife, Cali Lewis, decided to leave him. And when she did, my wife and I eventually took her side. And as far as Neal is concerned, that is reason to “rebuke you in the name of Jesus”. Yep. He did that to at least three or four people I know of as soon as they questioned what he was telling them about the whole mess.

It Didn’t Have To Be This Way

Neal and Cali had problems. Lots of people do. And sometimes marriages fail. Actually over half of marriages end in divorce according to Jennifer Baker. (Here’s the report: Half of Marriages End in Divorce).

Cali had a number of what I would consider to be extremely valid reasons for leaving (ie- I’d bet $1M you’d leave too…), and after she did Neal immediately acknowledged his faults to a number of people including myself, but then later began withdrawing his admissions and shifting blame.

Had Neal continued to accept his responsibility and taken steps to change, as far as I can tell, he would have still ended up divorced – but he would have been able to maintain some sort of a relationship with Cali, he would have been able to continue to work with her (likely on GeekBrief.TV) and the core group of people around the two of them would have continued to support him and be there for him.

But within 2-3 weeks he completely changed his position and decided that none of it was his fault, and everything was mine.

Let the Beatings Begin

As far as I can tell when Neal decides you are no longer useful – you become the enemy. At the beginning we conversed via chat and email. I told him that I would help both him and Cali. And he admitted that he was to blame. But while we chatted he also wanted to use me to convince Cali to come back to him. Or meet with him somewhere. When I refused to try and intercede on his behalf, he turned against me.

Neal Calls Me Satanic - Sep 4, 2010 at ~1:45 am

Over the coming weeks, and then months, Neal acted with conviction and malice to try and convince anyone who would listen to him that Cali had “abandoned God”, and that I was the primary cause of it. He called me evil, satanic, and a number of other things – and his insults were always sharpest in the early morning.

Why Would He Do That?

I don’t know. I can understand that going through a separation or divorce would be a very emotional time. I can even understand being angry and blaming people. But it is not rational to lash out publicly, and often, especially when the people whom you have decided to attack know all of your terrible secrets.

And why would a person take this sort of attack onto the Internet and do it in front of thousands of people on Twitter and Facebook? Was it some sort of a pre-emptive attack designed to undermine the integrity of the people who could share the full truth of the situation to the world?

Personally I would have thought that silence would be the best course of action, as opposed to starting a war. But I’m not Neal. And I guess in the middle of all this mess Neal forgot that I’m not the kind of person who would ever tolerate his attacks.

But Why Did You Sue Him?

1. Neal defamed me repeatedly for nearly a year both privately and to an audience of literally thousands of people on Twitter and Facebook. Although I have refrained from responding out of respect for Cali I will no longer ignore the attacks. I am further convinced that Neal will never stop unless forced to.
2. We may live in a free society, but individual free speech has limits. I’d be fine with Neal telling the world that he hates me, or calling me names; but when one person maliciously spreads lies in order to damage another’s reputation someone has to put an end to it.
3. Lets face it, the fact that I didn’t fight back is viewed by some people as taking the high road, but by others a long and sustained silence is tanamount to an admission of guilt. My silence has come to an end.

He’s No Saint

If you head over to Neal’s blog, or his Twitter account, or Facebook page virtually all you will see is talk of religion. He would have you believe he is the most faithful, God-fearing, community oriented Christian you’ve ever met – though I dare you to disagree with him about anything (literally, anything). And then see what happens.

If you go back and read his posts you will also see him repeatedly claiming that what he wants is to have Cali back, to go to marriage counseling, to save her from me, etc. Yet exactly one week after their divorce was finalized he told Cali that he is engaged and getting married again and would like her blessing! This can only mean that all of his public grief was merely an act designed to maximize sympathy for his position while he was obviously perfectly happy with whomever is now his fiance.

Well, Neal is an amazing actor but I’ve compiled an absolute moutain of evidence that demonstrates his sustained, malicious and attacking behavior which has been going on the entire time he professes to be pursuing his Christian ideals. And on top of that, I’ve got witnesses who are more than happy to share their personal stories of betrayal. Hopefully some of them will even chime in here…

In this instance, my attorneys assure me that we have an open and shut case of libel per se. And I’m looking forward to finally getting the full story on record in a court of law.

Ok, But Why Break the Silence and Post This Now?

Neal’s whereabouts are literally unknown. As far as we know, he moved in with whomever he is planning on marrying and has been living with her for a while. But no one knows where that is, so I don’t have an address to have him served at.

Since I promised Neal long ago that if he ever angered me enough to do something about it I would let him know in no uncertain terms, I thought it only fair to make sure he is aware that he has actually been sued so that he can answer the suit rather than skipping our court date and just having a summary judgement issued against him.

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Islamic clerics never cease to amaze me with their dazzling intellect and incredible application of truly dizzying logic. Here we have an interview from some TV station in the Middle East where a reporter (and I use that term very loosly) has a cleic explaining the proper ways to beat your wife (or wives as the case may be)!

I’ve captioned all of the content below, because after you watch this video you are probably going to need to read it again since you aren’t going to believe your eyes the first time around.

Reporter: Would you believe that the European women in our times yearns for a husband who would be like a guardian to her. I would like to provide the viewers with some statistics.

90% of British women do not want to marry a weak man, who sits down and cries the moment there is a problem. They say: No, such a man looks more like a woman. We want a manly man.

Wife beating is a serious accusation (leveled against Islam). Let us examine this matter bit by bit.

Cleric: Allah honored wives by instating the punishment of beatings.

Reporter: Honored them with beatings? How is this possible?!

Cleric: The Prophet Muhammad said: “Don’t beat her in the face, and do not make her ugly.

See how she is honored? If the husband beats his wife, he must not beat her in the face!”

Even when he beats her, he must not curse her. This is incredible! He beats her in order to discipline her. In addition, there must not be more than ten beatings, and he must not break her bones, injure her, break her teeth, or poke her in the eye. There is a beating etiquette. If he beats to discipline her, he must not raise his hand high. He must beat her from chest level.

All these things honor the woman!

She is in need of discipline! How should the husband discipline her? Through admonishment. If she is not deterred, he should refuse to share the bed with her. If she is not repentant, he should beat her, but there are rules to the beating.

It is forbidden to beat her in the face or make her ugly.
When you beat her you must not curse her.
Islam forbids this.

Reporter: With what should he beat her? With his bare hand? With a rod?

Cleric: If he beats her, the beatings should not be hard, so that they do not leave a mark.

He can beat her with a short rod. He must avoid beating her in the face or in places in the head where it hurts.

The beatings should be on the body and should not come one right after the other. These are all choices made during the process, but beatings are allowed only as a last resort.

The honoring of the wife in Islam is also evident in the fact that the punishment of beating is permissible in one case only: when she refuses to sleep with him.

Reporter: When she refuses to sleep with him?

Cleric: Yes, because where else could the husband go? He wants her, but she refuses. He should begin with admonishment and threats…

Reporter: Allow me to repeat this. A man cannot beat his wife… over food or drink.

Cleric: Beatings are permitted only in this case, which the husband cannot do without.

So, what do you think? Do all of you non-muslim women YEARN for a man who will beat you and instill some discipline in you? And by “discipline”, of course, I mean sexual desire – because the only time it’s acceptable to beat a woman is when she doesn’t want to have sex.

I mean personally I have found that the best way to warm a girl up to amorous advances is with a little punching bag foreplay, but I’m sure you already knew that, right?

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It never ceases to amaze me what bad decisions some corporate executives can make. But here comes a brand new one…

Three years ago I gave VistaPrint.com a try for some cards or something. Who cares what it was… I had a bad experience. I wrote about it on my blog. End of story. Except that it wasn’t. Many other people have since chimed in on that topic, one of whom is someone by the name of “Hubbers”. He claims to have had a really bad experience and then did a whole bunch of research to suggest that VistaPrint is associated with some fairly shady dealings.

I have no idea if that is true or false, but the information certainly seems to have some validity to it. Furthermore, I spot checked some of Hubber’s claims and the information presented does appear to be fact based. But I never would have known this if I hadn’t been forced to do the research when I received the following email from VistaPrint HQ!

UPDATE: Stop the presses! VistaPrint is NOT threatening to sue me! Their Ex-partner Adaptive Affinity Ltd is!

So, to summarize – Adaptive Affinity, kiss my ass. VistaPrint, we’re cool.

Website: onemansblog.com
Email:
Author: John P
Comment: Hubbers

Dear Sirs,
RE: DEFAMATION/LIBELLOUS STATEMENTS – Review: VistaPrint.com Business Cards
-

http://onemansblog.com/2007/07/20/review-vistaprintcom-business-cards/

We are writing on behalf of Adaptive Affinity Ltd and refer to the webpage listed above. This web page contains allegations regarding Adaptive Affinity and its partners that is inaccurate and defamatory in nature. It is our view the contents of this post left by ‘Hubbers’ on April 9, 2009 at 8:10 am is causing and could continue to cause serious reputational harm, not only to Adaptive Affinity but VP rewards also.

The accusations made in the post is simply untrue and no proof is offered to validate these claims.

The language used by ‘Hubbers’ is unacceptable and suggests to the ordinary user that the practices of Adaptive Affinity are unethical or at worst illegal. The entire post is an unfair attack on Adaptive Affinity and its partners. These are legitimate businesses with legitimate business practices.

Although the burden of proof lies with you to prove the truth in these statements made, as proof to you (and not for publication elsewhere) that Adaptive Affinity is a legitimate business we can confirm that less than one half a percent of the millions of consumers marketed to and the many thousands of members enrolled in Adaptive Affinity’s membership programs complain about their memberships.

Adaptive Affinity has always followed high standards of responsible corporate practice. We regularly undertake quality controls to ensure our respective business practices comply with or exceed industry standards and applicable law. These practices extend throughout the organisation. We rebut the assertions made in this article and accordingly we request that it is removed with immediate effect.

As the primary publisher and the person who exercises direct editorial control over what is published we would like to point out that you are responsible for all the posting on your site. This matter can still be resolved without incident if you act very quickly to our satisfaction now. However, if you fail to do so, we reserve all our legal rights and remedies in respect of this matter. We also reserve all our rights and remedies (in respect of all relevant posts) if you are involved with any other posts about us or if there is any other publication made as a result of your posts.

Please respond to this letter by return and in any event within 7 days of the date on which it is sent with full details of the actions and the timeframe you will be taking to urgently rectify this matter. Your cooperation in this matter is appreciated.

Yours faithfully

Adaptive Affinity
Cavendish House,
369 Burnt Oak Broadway, Edgware.
HA8 5AW. United Kingdom
t: +44 (0) 8701 432 343
f: +44 (0) 8701 432 344
contact@adaptiveaffinity.com

Let’s examine this, shall we?

1. The part that I put in bold there is fantastic. They are “reserving their rights and remedies”. Um, aren’t they always in reserve? What they mean is, “We are threatening to sue you in a court of law to force you to do what we want.”
2. When I take a look at Hubber’s comment critically all I see is a link to a random Washington Post article, and another link to his own site where he provides what appears to be a lot of information to support his claim.
3. I’m not here to take sides. If Hubbers was merely insulting VP without any merit, I’d delete the post, but I think that to any reasonable person this thing could go either way, so it’s not obviously defamatory (considering that truth is an absolute defense).
4. Even if it was defamatory, who in the heck was the moron that decided the best way to approach a well known blogger was to send a threatening email? Honestly, is that supposed to scare me?

The only thing this message did was make me angry, remind me of the bad experience I had with VistaPrint, cause me to really pay attention to Hubbers comment where I hadn’t even noticed it before, and get this additional spotlight on the whole affair.

Why in the hell do people do this? And what advice would you have given them if they felt like they had a legitimate complaint to lodge?

PS – Can you believe that at the same time they sent me this letter, they left a comment on the blog trying to appear “helpful”? What is going on? Good Cop / Bad Cop?

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Does anyone else Read Road & Track magazine? Are you as sick as me of turning through the pages at the back of the magazine and finding the Penis Enlargement ads?

What the hell is up these guys? Are they THAT broke? I mean, as I read through the magazine and see Ferraris, Bugattis, and other $100,000+ vehicles it makes me wonder why I’d see these spammy fake pill ads in the exact same magazine.

I think the problem with these magazines is that they have absolutely no shame about hiding these ads in the back of the mags, so maybe what they need is a little public attention to let them know that we are all sick of it, and it’s not worth whatever tiny ad revenue they are getting from it. If you agree, how about helping to spread the word by tweeting, blogging, Facebooking, or otherwise bookmarking this article?

And if you’ve got other examples of magazines running the same sort of fake pill crap please scan an image and link to it in the comments. We’ll get it added to the list…

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At least three people have asked me what I think about the new FTC guidelines dealing with Bloggers who accept freebies. For those of you who didn’t know it, the rules went into effect on December 1, 2009 in the US, so if you have a blog you better be aware of what we’re talking about.

Here is the video summary, straight from the horse’s mouth:

The Guidelines

So, what is the US government essentially demanding of it’s citizens? Let me sum it up for you:

• …an endorsement means any advertising message that consumers are likely to believe reflects the opinions, beliefs, findings, or experiences of a party other than the sponsoring advertiser, even if the views expressed by that party are identical…
• Endorsements must reflect the honest opinions, findings, beliefs, or experience of the endorser.
• …the endorsement may not be presented out of context or reworded so as to distort in any way the endorser’s opinion or experience…
• When the advertisement represents that the endorser uses the endorsed product, the endorser must have been a bona fide user of it at the time the endorsement was given.
• Endorsers also may be liable for statements made in the course of their endorsements.
• Whenever an advertisement represents, directly or by implication, that the endorser is an expert with respect to the endorsement message, then the endorser’s qualifications must in fact give the endorser the expertise that he or she is represented as possessing
• … an organization’s endorsement must be reached by a process sufficient to ensure that the endorsement fairly reflects the collective judgment of the organization.
• Blah, blah, blah…

Nothing here sounds unreasonable really. They are basically saying that you need to be honest when you talk about a product or service, you need to have actually used it if you say you do, you are liable for your statements if you turn out to be a lying sack of crap, etc.

So what’s the problem? Well, lets get right to it.

The HUGE GAPING HOLES!

Celebrity Exemptions

First of all lets start with this example the FCC gives:

A film star endorses a particular food product. The endorsement regards only points of taste and individual preference. This endorsement must, of course, comply with § 255.1 (honesty, etc.); but regardless of whether the star’s compensation for the commercial is a $1 million cash payment or a royalty for each product sold by the advertiser during the next year, no disclosure is required because such payments likely are ordinarily expected by viewers.

So, let me get this straight… A celebrity (like Oprah) could accept $1,000,000 from Betty Crocker to say that she loves eating those brownies, but I could not? I mean you’re telling me that because Oprah is a celebrity its OK for her to get paid to talk about liking something? But if Betty Crocker gives me a single free packet of brownie mix I have to disclose it?

F**K YOU FTC!!! Ever heard the phrase “all men are created equal“? Look it up.

Ok then, so let me ask this. What constitutes “celebrity”? I mean, at which point do I get to stop telling people that I am getting paid to say something and just say it? I mean, is John P. a celebrity? What would it take to prove that I am one? I mean, I’m #1 on Google for John P. Does that make me a celebrity? My blog gets more traffic than most “celebrity’s” blogs. Does that do it?

How about Cali Lewis from GeekBeat.TV. Is she a celebrity? I sure think so. Does the FTC? I mean, if she talks nice about a Wiget because she likes it, and they give her a kickback on the back end, she doesn’t have to tell me right? Because “…such payments likely are ordinarily expected by viewers…” right?

Morons!

Celebrity Non-Exemptions!

But wait! Lest the concept of Celebrity be misconstrued to give someone carte blanch, lets see what happens if they talk about a medical procedure instead of a brownie!

Consumers might not realize that a celebrity discussing a medical procedure in a television interview has been paid for doing so, and knowledge of such payments would likely affect the weight or credibility consumers give to the celebrity’s endorsement. Without a clear and conspicuous disclosure that the athlete has been engaged as a spokesperson for the clinic, this endorsement is likely to be deceptive.

WHAT? So, Oprah can get paid $1M to say she loved a brownie, but if she gets her teeth whitened for free by a local clinic and she says she loves it – she goes to jail! Holy jeepers batman.

Are you confused yet? Well not as much as me, so let’s continue…

Stickin It To the Experts

A college student who has earned a reputation as a video game expert maintains a personal weblog or “blog” where he posts entries about his gaming experiences. Readers of his blog frequently seek his opinions about video game hardware and software. As it has done in the past, the manufacturer of a newly released video game system sends the student a free copy of the system and asks him to write about it on his blog.

He tests the new gaming system and writes a favorable review. Because his review is disseminated via a form of consumer-generated media in which his relationship to the advertiser is not inherently obvious, readers are unlikely to know that he has received the video game system free of charge… Accordingly, the blogger should clearly and conspicuously disclose that he received the gaming system free of charge.

Um. Questions:

1. What is the difference between an “expert” and a “celebrity”? Why does the celebrity get special treatment? I personally think experts should get the same treatment or better! I care more about their opinions.
2. In fact, what happens if the expert comments on the brownie in the previous example? Oh brother…
3. Why does the FTC assume that “…such payments likely are ordinarily expected by viewers…” when it comes to celebrities, but that “…readers are unlikely to know that he has received the video game system free of charge…”? That is simply ridiculous! I – like you probably – assume that EITHER one gets things for free.

And besides, getting a crappy little computer system isn’t as likely to make people wrongly endorse a product as getting paid $1M is! I mean, Tiger Woods was pimping OLDSMOBILES!!! Seriously?!? Remember that wreck he just got in? Yeah it was a Cadillac, not an Oldsmobile!

Affiliate Programs

Ok, lets talk about affiliate programs for a minute! Wait… I almost forgot. They left them completely out of the guidelines!

• So, what happens if I write a review of a product and include a link to Amazon.com’s page on the product? I mean, Amazon will pay me if someone clicks on that link and buys it. But I don’t get paid if they don’t buy it! What now?

So, are we going to amend the rules to state that not only if you get paid, but if you might possibly one day get paid, you still need to disclose?

Don’t worry! Newspapers are Exempt!

You may be thinking, wait a minute! What about my favorite news food editor who gets to eat at all the restaurants in town for free so the owners can suck up to them? What will happen to him? Never fear! According to this Boston.com article:

“Newspapers and magazines are not subject to the FTC’s new guidelines, even on their websites.”

Gee, that’s really swell. So, the evil bloggers (like me) need to be controlled, monitored and disclosed – but the heavenly news reporters can continue going about business as usual. Doesn’t that make everyone feel safer already!

Wait a minute! Since Boston.com only has like a million more readers than me, shouldn’t they be the ones having to disclose? How much damage can I really do as compared to them?

Other Hypocritical Crap

So, if the FTC intends to make bloggers disclose every time they get a free Koozie at a trade show and then review a companies’ product, are they going to crack down in these scenarios?

1. Lets say that Coke pays $1M in order to get their product onto the American Idol TV show. But how do we know that they really like Coke? And why didn’t they have to disclose the sponsorship payment?
2. Verizon decides to have a new nationwide marketing campaign for their cell phone service and they use an Elvis song as the theme for it. Elvis is dead. He can’t possibly endorse Verizon!
3. Every person that attends the Oscars wearing an outfit given to them by a celebrity designer is doing it just to get seen. Disclosure?
4. Your best friend owns a landscaping business. You’ve been spreading the word to help him drum up some business. You’re not getting paid, but he’s your best friend! And you haven’t been disclosing that! Shame on you!

The End!

If the confusion and inconsistent treatment outlined above aren’t disconcerting enough, keep in mind that I can think of about 20 ways to game the system even with “increased scrutiny”. For example, how about if I just move my business across the border to any other country on Earth and continue paying bloggers for their endorsements? The other 19 ideas are for sale. Just send me some money and I’ll tell them to you. And I won’t even tell the FTC that I got paid to do it!

The bottom line is that whether or not someone gets paid to endorse a product has no bearing on how I evaluate the merit of that product. I take a look at that individual, think about their credentials, evaluate the product, and make a final value judgment – just like the rest of the world. The FTC can’t legislate that. They need to stick to matters dealing with fraudulent behavior and stop meddling with topics where judgment and personal reputations are at issue. Caveat Emptor!

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Here is a question: There is a couple that wants to get married. The guy is a satanic priest with body modifications including piercings all over his body, horns implanted under his skin on his shaved skull and tattoos from head to toe. Let’s also imagine he’s also a convicted rapist, wife abuser and pedophile. He has been legally married and divorced 18 times, he is 44 years old, and he’s a crack dealer.

It is the girl’s 18th birthday today. She has a 6th grade education and was from Mississippi before running away and living on the street as a prostitute in California. She is utterly addicted to crack (and he’s her dealer). Legally can they wed?

Of course the question is rhetorical! They are two “consenting” adults. The fact that most people would agree this marriage is doomed to failure and divorce is of no legal consequence. The law is blind to all circumstances other than the fact that one man and one woman may wed.

The Quandary

How about this scenario: There is a couple that wants to get married. The woman is 33 years old, holds a PHD from Stanford, is a renowned scientist and educator and runs marathons and volunteers at a women’s shelter in her spare time. The other woman is 32 years old, holds a PHD from Harvard, and recently won the Nobel Peace Prize for her work in a third world country which brought about the end of hostilities. They have been living together for 8 years and are deeply in love with one another in a committed monogamous relationship. Legally can they wed?

Although their relationship has already outlived the national average life of a traditional marriage, and although they are both brilliant women who are stellar contributors to society, of course they cannot wed. Because again, the law is blind to all circumstances other than the fact that one man and one woman may wed.

A final scenario: A couple has been married for 20 years. They are highly educated, affluent, generous and caring. They cannot have children. Their best friends are another 20 year married couple, who also cannot have children, and the husband is killed in a tragic car accident. The three remaining friends go through a difficult time reconciling the death, and the widow decides she does not want to search for another soul mate.

During the process the three friends discover that they all have deep love for one another and decide to open their lives and share everything with one another. After 10 years of cohabitation, caring for one another and supportive loving relationships they decide they would like to be wed as a single consenting family.

Even though these three people are deeply in love, have 50 years of combined marriage experience, are well educated, affluent and have only each other to care for, a complete marriage is out of the question because the law is blind to all circumstances other than the fact that one man and one woman may wed.

Why is it that a man and a woman are legally allowed to wed under any circumstances? They could be incarcerated at the time for the most heinous of crimes. They could both be mentally deficient and generally just horrible human beings.

Why is it that two men or two women are not allowed to wed under any circumstances? Even if they are deeply in love and in a committed relationship.

Why also is a plural marriage not allowed between consenting adults? We’re talking about people living under the same roof, sharing the same life.

My Perspective on the Matter

In my opinion, if we were simply talking about the legal right of people to wed one another the matter would probably be a non-issue and all marriages would be allowed. However, many people believe that allowing anything other than a one woman, one man marriage will open the door to other abuses and social issues. Even if that belief were justified, potential has never been a valid reason for denying basic rights.

I would consider the concept of “freedom to marry” to be similar to “freedom of speech”. Opponents would argue that non-traditional marriages may result in legal or social problems such as underage marriage, child custody issues or the “watering down” of the very definition of marriage. But surely freedom of speech may result in slander, liable or inciting a riot. In both cases basic freedoms should be constrained.

The freedom to marry should not outweigh laws which prohibit a minor from marrying – no matter the orientation of the marriage, straight, gay or plural. Concerns regarding paternal rights do not change if a father has been married and divorced from two women with children, or is simultaneously married to both.

And as far as “watering down” marriage is concerned, social perceptions have no place in the law. (If they did, AIDS would be illegal.) Society will have to adjust and individual perceptions change over time. People will learn to evaluate the weight of a marriage between a 90 year old couple, married for 60 years, vs. a one month 20 person plural marriage performed as a record breaking attempt. This won’t be any different from the way people already weigh successful marriages (Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee vs. your grandparents).

The End

If marriage laws were changed to allow a wider variety of orientations it would be a beginning rather than an end. All sorts of scenarios will be discovered which test the boundaries of each variety of relationship. But luckily we already have a court system whose job it is to hear all sides and render a fair and unbiased decision!

I believe that marriage as a legal device is a fundamental right of all people. I also do not believe there should be constraints placed upon this legal device other than adult consent. I also think that it is only a matter of time before the courts system comes to recognize this right as no less fundamental than the rights of speech, assembly, and press. Marriage is the most personal of all legal institutions.

So, what do you think? And I just can’t wait to hear all of the religious arguments which are about to show up. I guess I’ll let someone else tackle the subject of “separation of church and state”…

Models

Please keep in mind that my fictional stories above have no bearing on the photos of the models I’m using to illustrate them. Much thanks goes out to the following:

• Image of guy with horns courtesy of Philippe Leroyer
• Image of the hooker is courtesy of DCvision2006.
• Image of the lesbian couple courtesy of feastoffun.
• Image of mugshot photos courtesy of Angus McDiarmid.

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Have you ever been to the zoo? I was at the Dallas Zoo the other day, staring at the primates. Don’t worry, they were staring right back. Anyway, this big male gorilla, who had been sitting quietly with a couple of females laying around nearby, suddenly just got up and freaked out.

Now, I should emphasize, nothing caused this. Seriously. He’s a gorilla. There is nothing to piss him off. But all of a sudden, he got in a bad mood and started taking it out on all the other gorillas nearby. They are all running in fear, the people staring at them are freaking out, and I’m just thinking… you big, dumb ape.

Well, I expect that creatures who lack the ability to use a spoon might be wild and unpredictable. But you know what drives me crazy? Humans who do the same damn thing!

Lately I’ve heard a rash of stories from friends and family about situations they’ve been in at work in which customers are just complete assholes for no apparent reason. In fact, I was even at McDonalds today when this snooty woman came in carrying her child that was acting up. The extremely courteous young lady behind the counter greeted her quickly and politely, and then this dirtbag of a woman just started acting like that aforementioned gorilla.

Back in my grandfather’s day society didn’t tolerate that kind of behavior. They’d have escorted a rude customer right out of the joint, and then that woman would have been the talk of the town. I actually got so offended on behalf of the girl behind the counter that I snapped at that lady, “Hey! If you’ve got a personal problem, keep it to yourself! No need to ruin these nice people’s day, so how about NOT being an a-hole?!? It’s no wonder your kid has a bad attitude. Take a look in the mirror.”

For a second after I said that, the entire place was so quiet you could have heard a McNugget drop. The kid shut up. The lady turned and looked at me, and her mouth dropped open. And you know how sometimes you just know when someone is about to say something? Yeah, I saw it coming, so I hopped in real quick with, “You don’t want to say anything to me. I guarantee I am meaner than you ever dreamed of being in your entire life.”

It was amazing. She turned around, completed her order – clarifying that it was “to go” – and quietly walked off to the side. About that time, my food came up. I politely thanked the nice young lady behind the counter, who thanked me right back, and took my food to a table to sit and eat in peace.

Now here is the problem with all of this. What goes around, comes around. All of these jackasses are simply adding to the decay of our polite society. I bet I’m the only guy who ever reproached that lady in her life. And she goes around ruining people’s day and leaving a trail of destruction in her wake. But someone has to come in line after her. And once she ruins the attitude of the person who was helping her, service diminishes for the next person.

You see how this works? It’s a chain reaction. You ruin someone’s day, and they pass it on. But guess what! It works the other way too! I wrote about this over two years ago, so in case you missed it go find out how I Discovered the Secret to Happiness at 7-11.

PS – Thanks to Squid for the gorilla image.

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Just a few weeks ago my beloved dog Sandy came to the end of a long and debilitating struggle with kidney failure. My wife and I did everything we could to prolong her life and make her happy and comfortable, but none of us can cheat death, and eventually it was upon us.

One of the most difficult decisions of my life came when I was forced to choose to euthanize my faithful companion of more than a decade. It was compounded by a feeling of guilt – not that I had acted too soon, but that perhaps I had waited too long out of grief and a sense of personal loss. I remember wishing for days that she could tell me if it was worth living, or if she merely wished she could die.

When we finally had our vet come to the house and put her to rest it was a traumatic experience for the family, yet the death was so quite, fast and peaceful that not only did it remove any feeling of lingering doubt that we had done the right thing, but it made me consider my own mortality and caused me to realize that ultimately I would rather be able to go like this, than be imprisoned in a body stricken with ailments, waiting for death to take me.

Well, this is the situation that Sir Edward Downes, and his wife of 54 years, Lady Joan, found themselves in. And luckily for them, they were able to make the decision to leave this world on their own terms. I only wish that we had the freedom to choose for our selves here in the USA.

According to the UK’s Guardian:

One of Britain’s most respected conductors, Sir Edward Downes, and his wife, Joan, a choreographer and TV producer, have died at an assisted suicide clinic in Switzerland, their family said today.

Downes, 85, was almost blind when he and his 74-year-old wife, who had become his full-time carer, travelled to Switzerland to end their lives, a family statement released to the BBC said.

Born in Birmingham, Downes had a long and distinguished career, including conducting the first performance at the Sydney Opera House. He worked with the BBC Philharmonic and the Royal Opera House in London.

The statement from the couple’s son and daughter, Caractacus and Boudicca, said they “died peacefully, and under circumstances of their own choosing”.

The statement continued: “After 54 happy years together, they decided to end their own lives rather than continue to struggle with serious health problems.”

The couple died at a clinic run by Dignitas, the Swiss organisation that operates a specialist euthanasia service.

In my opinion, the notion of a society making assisted suicide a crime among humans, while allowing the very practice with our animals is the absolutely pinnacle of hypocrisy. On one hand, we recognize that the suffering is so great that death is a better substitute – but we then imagine that it simply doesn’t apply to humans?

The problem we have is an over-estimation of the value of life in this case. We actually strip the individual of their own free will to act in their best interests, and instead impose a false concept that absolutely nothing could justify the request to die, nor the assistance given to the individual to do so.

The same people who would often pose religious or sociological arguments in opposition to assisted suicides would be willing to give their own lives in defense of their beliefs. A choice, I would remind you, of one’s own life or death.

As for me, I can imagine any number of scenarios where I would pray for death rather than suffering the indignity of living. I only hope that one day my country wakes up and decides to grant me the freedom to choose my own fate.

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Fantastic video on the progression of information technology, researched by Karl Fisch, Scott McLeod, and Jeff Bronman, remixed. I actually thought I posted this video previously, but I can’t seem to find it anywhere. Even if I did, it’s worth taking another look.

The concept of the video is to throw out statistics at you which are shocking, enlightening, or just plain make you think. For example:

• If you are one in a million in China, there are 1,300 of you.
• The number of text messages sent daily exceeds the population of Earth.
• By 2013 supercomputers will be more powerful than the human brain.

So, what are we to make of all this?

Thanks to Mike Mitchell for sending this vid my way!

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So what have we learned in two millennia?

“The budget should be balanced, the Treasury should be refilled, public debt should be reduced, the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed lest Rome become bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.”

– Cicero – 55 BC

…Evidently nothing.

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Mark Cuban pitched an idea over on his blog in which he offers to fund business plans for people, but only if:

• People completely detail out their business plan in public.
• The businesses must show a profit within 90 days.
• You use the bank of Mark’s choice and allow him control over expenditures.

Unfortunately, I believe Mark is off base with this concept, and left the following comment over there on his blog. I doubt he’ll respond, but he did at least get people talking – even though he might have done more harm than good.

Mark,

I’ve been reading your blog for quite a while. Never left a comment before. Decided now was the time.

First of all, let’s be clear about one thing. I don’t want your money. Won’t take it if you offer it just on principle of being entirely candid. Now that that’s out of the way.

I’m not sure I understand your impetus for putting this “offer” out there? Trying to figure out if it is a publicity stunt, a VC pitch in disguise, an “off the top of your head” idea, or what? But I fail to see how asking all of these people to pitch an idea in the open and asking them to “open source” the project adds value?

You are asking people, in essence, to forego first mover advantage on any sort of good idea. You are asking them to forego the ability to get patent protection, copyright, or any other sort of valuable intellectual property. This will only serve to weaken fledgling businesses – not help them get launched.

In addition to that, you’ve placed restrictions on cash flow and profitability that will have the exact opposite effect on employment as you purport to be seeking. Anyone looking to hire employees can barely get them up to speed in 60 days much less have the business break even. This means you are pretty much limiting the opportunities to one man shows in fields that have extremely low barriers to entry.

I would suggest that if you wish you really help fund businesses and put people to work you should change your parameters.

- Allow 6 months to reach break even, 9 to turn a profit.
- Ensure that the plan requires the business to actually hire a minimum number of employees (like 3-4).
- Remove the restriction on generating “any” ad revenue in lieu of ad revenue being only a secondary source (if a business can be profitable without ads, why not allow ads as a bonus?)
- Ease up on the cash flow and banking restrictions. You can’t tell people that you won’t be available, but that you have to approve of monetary decisions. You’ll stifle the business.
- And for God’s sake, don’t require them to publish the entire plan in the open and encourage stealing of the idea!

I know that you said that you are “trying not to be a VC”, but frankly these “terms” are worse than any VC terms I’ve ever seen. They are unrealistic when it comes to creating real employment, they are more restrictive than necessary, and they just aren’t going to work.

How about doing something completely different? Why don’t you buy a small building which can be partitioned into “open source office space” and give small businesses a free place to actually get together, work and share ideas. Augment this by inviting successful business people to come in and help with brainstorming sessions, etc. And perhaps organize a group of Angel investors to listen to real business plans. (I’d help, and even consider Angel investing if you did this.)

In short, I’m a fan of the Open Source model. But I think the way you’ve gone about open sourcing this particular concept is a bit off.

Cheers, and good luck!

John P.

Of course, Mark is as free to do with his money as the rest of us are. But I hope that he changes his mind about this particular project because I don’t see anything good coming of it.

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Wow! I’m not sure if the letter below is legitimate or fabricated. It sounds like it could be from a real Marine, and so I’m going to publish it just in case. Either way, it gives you a lot to think about…

It’s freezing here. I’m sitting on hard, cold dirt between rocks and shrubs at the base of the Hindu Kush Mountains along the Dar ‘yoi Pomir River watching a hole that leads to a tunnel that leads to a cave. Stake out, my friend, and no pizza delivery for thousands of miles.

I also glance at the area around my ass every ten to fifteen seconds to avoid another scorpion sting. I’ve actually given up battling the chiggers and sand fleas, but them scorpions give a jolt like a cattle prod. Hurts like a bastard. The antidote tastes like transmission fluid but God bless the Marine Corps for the five vials of it in my pack.

The one truth the Taliban cannot escape is that, believe it or not, they are human beings, which means they have to eat food and drink water. That requires couriers and that’s where an old bounty hunter like me comes in handy. I track the couriers, locate the tunnel entrances and storage facilities, type the info into the handheld, shoot the coordinates up to the satellite link that tells the air commanders where to drop the hardware, we bash some heads for a while, then I track and record the new movement.

It’s all about intelligence. We haven’t even brought in the snipers yet. These scurrying rats have no idea what they’re in for. We are but days away from cutting off supply lines and allowing the eradication to begin.

I dream of bin Laden waking up to find me standing over him with my boot on his throat as I spit into his face and plunge my nickel plated Bowie knife through his frontal lobe. But you know me. I’m a romantic. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: This country blows, man. It’s not even a country. There are no roads, there’s no infrastructure, there’s no government. This is an inhospitable, rock pit shit hole ruled by eleventh century warring tribes. There are no jobs here like we know jobs.

Afghanistan offers two ways for a man to support his family: join the opium trade or join the army. That’s it. Those are your options. Oh, I forgot, you can also live in a refugee camp and eat plum-sweetened, crushed beetle paste and squirt mud like a goose with stomach flu if that’s your idea of a party. But the smell alone of those ‘tent cities of the walking dead’ is enough to hurl you into the poppy fields to cheerfully scrape bulbs for eighteen hours a day.

I’ve been living with these Tajiks and Uzbeks and Turkmen and even a couple of Pushtins for over a month and a half now and this much I can say for sure: These guys, all of ‘em, are Huns…actual, living Huns. They LIVE to fight. It’s what they do. It’s ALL they do. They have no respect for anything, not for their families or for each other or for themselves.

They claw at one another as a way of life. They play polo with dead calves and force their five-year-old sons into human cockfights to defend the family honor. Huns, roaming packs of savage, heartless beasts who feed on each other’s barbarism. Cavemen with AK47′s. Then again, maybe I’m just cranky.

I’m freezing my ass off on this stupid hill because my lap warmer is running out of juice and I can’t recharge it until the sun comes up in a few hours.

Oh yeah! You like to write letters, right? Do me a favor, Bizarre. Write a letter to CNN and tell Wolf and Anderson and that awful, sneering, pompous Aaron Brown to stop calling the Taliban ‘smart.’ They are not smart. I suggest CNN invest in a dictionary because the word they are looking for is ‘cunning.’ The Taliban are cunning, like jackals and hyenas and wolverines. They are sneaky and ruthless and, when confronted, cowardly. They are hateful, malevolent parasites who create nothing and destroy everything else. Smart. Pfft. Yeah, they’re real smart.

They’ve spent their entire lives reading only one book(and not a very good one, as books go) and consider hygiene and indoor plumbing to be products of the devil. They’re still figuring out how to work a Bic lighter. Talking to a Taliban warrior about improving his quality of life is like trying to teach an ape how to hold a pen; eventually he just gets frustrated and sticks you in the eye with it.

OK, enough. Snuffle will be up soon so I have to get back to my hole. Covering my tracks in the snow takes a lot of practice but I’m good at it. Please, I tell you and my fellow Americans to turn off the TV sets and move on with your lives.

The story line you are getting from CNN and other news agencies is utter bullshit and designed not to deliver truth but rather to keep you glued to the screen through the commercials. We’ve got this one under control. The worst thing you guys can do right now is sit around analyzing what we’re doing over here because you have no idea what we’re doing and, really, you don’t want to know. We are your military and we are doing what you sent us here to do.

You wanna help? Buy Bonds America.

Saucy Jack

Recon Marine in Afghanistan
Semper Fi

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Today The United States of America took a profound step forward. I don’t believe that any of us can yet comprehend the gravity of the day, but I am certain that we witnessed an event that will be forever etched in history. We, the people, freely elected Barack Hussein Obama as our leader, and today he took control of the most powerful and prosperous nation, perhaps ever, on the planet.

The video below captured this historic event, including both the presidential inauguration and President Obama’s address to the nation. If you were unable to see it previously I suggest taking a look at it now. President Obama’s address was meant not only for the citizens of the United States, but for the people of the world.

I also encourage you to view the Microsoft Photosynth site to see the pictures from the event overlayed in 3D so you can get a perspective of the entire event from multiple angles.

My Commentary

The 2008 race for the presidency was an historic one, because no matter which side won, American’s would be celebrating a changing of the guard. No longer would the Executive branch of the government be dominated by old, white men. We were either going to have a Woman for Vice President, or a mixed-race President (half white/half black).

We may choose to disagree over political topics such as taxes, court appointments, abortion, gun control and the like. But there are still many areas where Americans can stand together and demonstrate our unwavering conviction to freedom, liberty and one another.

Photo courtesy ZachStern

• No longer may race be deemed a handicap or weakness. If we are colorblind to the most powerful man on Earth, surely we can be colorblind to one another. Young men and women of color can stand a little taller tomorrow and know that the rest of us judge them by their character and contributions – not by the color of their skin. This is as much of a responsibility as it is a relief. The only excuses for failure are now personal.
• “Hope” is an idea that we are free to convert to reality by the simple application of conviction. A great number of our citizens were moved to act based on a hope for change. Their reasons are varied. Some were moved by war, others by ideology, still others by economy. But the collective spirit of the American people, through a collaborative act of conviction, impressed their will on the future.
• Our American community has a responsibility to one another, our future, and our Global neighbors. We understand the consequences that our activities and decisions bring, and we are willing to accept them. We are also willing to change everything when necessary. Our elected officials, our lifestyles, and even the very principals that define us as a nation. Our forefathers did this throughout history, and today we still have the strength to carry on the tradition.

I, for one, am indeed hopeful. I hope to live in a world free from religious intolerance. Free from greed and corruption. Free from bigotry – be it race, religion, sex, or sexual preference. Free from tyranny. Free from starvation and illness. My hope is based on the belief that we, as a global community, have the technology, wealth and wisdom to make all of these things true… and more.

The only question that remains, is whether we have the conviction to see it all through.

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I have a very close friend (who shall go unnammed) that seems to admire Fidel Castro. Well my friend, I came across this post at IBD editorials about Cuba’s 50 years of failure, and I just had to share it!

Spare us the fireworks and media-parroted claims of Fidel Castro’s dictatorship bringing universal health care and education to Cuba. The real story is that a prosperous Cuba was turned into ruins in just five decades.

Its inflation-adjusted gross domestic product is a mere 5% of what it was in 1958, the year before Castro took over, according to Jorge Salazar-Carillo of Florida International University.

1957: Cuban GDP is about $2.8 billion, unadjusted for inflation.

1959: Castro and his guerrillas take over and begin confiscating U.S.-owned private businesses.

1960: President Eisenhower imposes trade embargo, excluding food and medicine; Castro responds by “rapidly nationalizing most U.S. enterprises,” as he himself wrote.

1961: President Kennedy tightens the embargo. Castro blames it for plant shutdowns, parts shortages and 7,000 transportation breakdowns a month, leaving 25% of public buses inoperable. He then targets Cuban companies for expropriation.

1962: Begins food rationing. Half of passenger rail cars go out of service from lack of maintenance.

1963: President Kennedy freezes Cuban assets in the U.S.

1965: Signs deal with USSR to reschedule $500 million in debt.

1966: Signs new deal with Soviets for $91 million in trade credits.

1968: Begins petroleum rationing, says Soviets cut supplies.

1969: Begins sugar rationing in January, announces state plan to produce 10 million tons of sugar by the following year.

1970: Castro announces only 8.5 million tons of sugar produced. Blames U.S. Diverts 85% of all Cuban trade to the USSR.

1973: Tries for the first time to tie wages to productivity.

1974: Ramps up wartime spending to send 3,000 Cuban troops to Africa. It hits $125 per person, highest in Latin America, by 1988.

1975: President Ford announces softening of the embargo, letting foreign subsidiaries of U.S. companies sell products in Cuba.

1979: President Carter lets Cuban-Americans visit family in Cuba. Soviet aid totals $17 billion from 1961-79, or 30% of Cuba’s GDP.

1980: Economic hardship forces Castro to permit farmers to sell surplus to state quotas in private markets with unregulated prices. 100,000 Cubans flee the island for the U.S. via the Mariel boatlift.

1982: Cuba doubles military spending. President Reagan re-establishes travel ban and prohibits spending money on the island.

1983: Cuba signs accord in Paris to refinance its foreign debt.

1984: “Armed Forces of Latin America” yearbook says: “Cuba is probably the world’s most completely militarized country.”

1985: Cuba signs new debt restructuring, blaming Mexico’s crisis for its debacle. Permits selling of private housing for the first time. Total aid from USSR since 1961 hits $40 billion.

1986: Castro defaults on $10.9 billion in Paris Club debt. Blames sugar prices. Abolishes coffee breaks, cuts subsidies. Soviets give $3 billion more in credit and aid. Castro bans farmers markets.

1987: Stops paying entirely on $10.9 billion Paris Club debts.

1988: Forbids release of inflation data, making it impossible for researchers to assess Cuban economic performance.

1990: By official statistics, GDP per capita declines 10.3%.

1991: Sugar crop falls to 7 million tons. Politburo purged. USSR ends $5 billion in subsidies. “Special Period” of austerity begins.

1992: Horse-drawn carts replace cars, oxen replace Soviet tractors. Time magazine reports tin cans are recycled into drinking cups and banana peels into Cuban sandals.

1993: World Bank says GDP contracts 15.1% per capita, as industrial output plunges 40% per person.

1994: Some private-sector activity permitted. GDP per capita shows no growth, but Castro hails “recovery.” Agricultural output down 54% from 1989, with sugar at 4 million tons. Castro blames bad finances, and “errors and inefficiency.” Food consumption, according to USDA, falls 36%. Some 32,000 Cubans flee for Florida.

1995: Havana admits GDP fell 35% from 1989 to 1993. Vice President Carlos Lage claims GDP grew 2.5%, as inflation hits 19%.

1996: Castro hikes private business taxes. President Clinton tightens embargo. Castro claims GDP rose to 7% in year.

1997: GDP reported up 2.5%, falling short of 5% projection. Failed sugar harvest, bad weather, crop pests, foreign debts blamed.

1998: GDP growth claimed at 1.2% with no inflation. U.S. embargo, global financial crisis, low commodity prices, too much rainfall, Hurricane Georges and severe drought blamed. Castro urges other debtor nations to form a cartel.

1999: GDP claimed at 6.2%. Subsidies from Venezuela begin. Castro blames U.S. dollar for woes and urges use of the euro.

2000: Cuban court rules U.S. owes Cuba $121 billion for embargo.

2001: 3.6% GDP growth, output remains below 1989. Blames loss of subsidies, second-worst sugar harvest ever at 3.5 million tons.

2002: Freezes dollar sales to preserve foreign reserves. Shuts down 118 factories due to power shortages. Buys $125 million in U.S. food. Defaults on $750 million in Japanese debts.

2003: Earns more tight sanctions from President Bush and European Union over dissident roundups. GDP rises just 1.8%.

2004: Castro declares GDP a capitalist instrument, adjusts calculations, declares GDP growing at 5%.

2005: Foreign firms asked to leave and market liberalization scrapped. Imports hit three-times the level of exports. Hurricanes blamed for falling farm output. Sugar figures not released. Castro calls economic crisis an “enemy fabrication.” Claims GDP up 11%.

2006: Castro claims 12.5% economic growth, “despite the crippling effects of the U.S. embargo,” Luxner News notes.

2007: 7.5% GDP growth claimed; adverse weather said to have affected construction and agriculture.

2008: 4.3% GDP growth claimed, far short of 8% forecast. “One of the most difficult years since the collapse of the Soviet Union,” economy minister says. Hurricanes and fuel prices blamed.

That, in sum, is Cuba after 50 years. But lest you get the wrong idea, Cuba hasn’t failed at everything: “Given their goal — to destroy capitalism and entrench themselves — they’re a success,” said Humberto Fontova, an expert on Castro’s regime.

Oh, and because I have to pour salt on open wounds, here is a video about the “success of Cuba” too. Enjoy!

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Bill Maher seems to be following in Michael Moore’s footsteps by putting out a movie called Religulous. This film, which I’m certain will prove to be extremely divisive, makes the case that the most dangerous force on earth is religion.

Maher’s ultimate message is simple: Abandon religion… or we’ll all die.

In the clip that follows, Maher lays out the foundation of this statement. Here are a few choice quotes which I believe pretty much sum things up:

• “If one believes that the world is going to come to an end, does it not drain one’s motivation to improve life while we’re here?”
• “Religion must die for man to live.”
• “Faith means making a virtue out of not thinking.”
• “Those who preach faith and enable and elevate it are intellectual slaveholders.”
• “Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings, who don’t have all the answers, to think they do.”
• “The only attitude for man to have about the big questions is not the arrogant certitude that is the hallmark of religion, but doubt.”
• “The solace and comfort that religion brings you, actually comes at a terrible price.”

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