I like to hang out at a local coffee shop. I’ll go there alone, or sometimes with my wife. I will read and/or write and if my wife is there, she will knit. Â On occasion I will meet a friend there and we will solve world issues or plan whatever our next big thing is going to be.
I have loved this place from the first moment I walked in there about a year and a half ago and we view it as our local Cheers, where everybody knows your name. At the very least, most in there are a familiar face. Now that I have established this scenario for you, let me share a specific incident that happened to me recently.
My seat in this place is on a love seat which happens to be paired with a matching chair and they are arranged in a way to have a conversation with one or two friends. I’m sure I’m not the only one that views that particular corner as their own but as far as I’m concerned, when I’m there, it is rightfully mine.
One Saturday morning, I’m sitting there doing my thing and actually waiting for my wife to show up when someone came up and asked to sit in the chair next to me. I declined his offer while at the same time explaining my dilemma of my wife showing up soon. The place was mostly empty so it wasn’t like seating was at a premium. He moved on.
Within 10 minutes, someone else came up and just sat down. He didn’t ask permission or anything, he simply took what was not rightfully his, in my opinion. Â It was at this moment when I became acutely aware of how large my space bubble actually was and clearly, we had an invasion. If I know you and you walk up, of course you can sit down and you will be welcome into my space. Â If I don’t know you and you sit down against my will, then it’s an invasion.
Back to the scene of the crime. I’m adjusting to my new reality of not having my space unencumbered when my new “friend” crossed his legs, putting his ankle on his knee. Â The sole of his shoe is now 6″ away from my knee! At this point, I’m twitching!
I may have unusual space standards, I really don’t know. I actually had to leave shortly after he got comfy, or I feared I would implode but I wasn’t sure if I should give him a hug or what the appropriate departure should be.
Is there such a thing as coffee shop etiquette? Are there certain rules that should be observed or is it a free for all? Am I out of line for thinking that loveseat/chair arrangement all belongs to me? Maybe it’s time to write down these unwritten rules that we all seem to know but we clearly don’t all adhere to.
What are your top coffee shop etiquette rules?









