How to Speak Texan

TexasTexans may tend to talk a little slow, but don’t let that fool you. The Texan culture relishes wit, wisdom and storytelling. And since I routinely communicate with folks all over the world I figured it would be appropriate to publish a little “Texan to English” translation guide to ensure people always know what I’m gettin on about.

So, in case you’d like to learn how to talk like a Texan, or if you just need to occasionally translate something you heard me say in passing, here is a lexicon of phrases and colloquialisms from Texas.
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This is So Funny it Made Me Cry

BrothersGood lord, this is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen!

In this video two brothers are trying to take one simple little photograph for Mother’s Day, and they just can’t seem to make it happen. I now know with absolute certainty that the CIA was bugging my house as a child, because these guys must have somehow gained access to the secret surveillance tapes to re-enact a scene between my very own brother and myself.
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Incredible Japanese Kinetic Machines

This is the highest rated video I’ve ever seen. It has been viewed 3 million times and has maintained a perfect 5 star rating from over 20,000 people! Just watch it and you’ll see why.

Be warned, the video is 13 minutes long, and once you start watching its impossible to stop! I’m not kidding, there is some amazing engineering at work here, and every time you think they can’t possibly come up with something new, they outdo themselves!
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The Universcale Puts Everything in Perspective

UniverscaleThere is a very, very cool interactive demo that Nikon is presenting over on their site called the Universcale.

Let’s see, how can I describe it… well, it’s kind of like this video which I previously posted that shows how the size of our planets relate to other objects in the universe, except that the Universcale is interactive and also goes the other way all the way down to subatomic particles.

It really has to be seen to be understood, and it is well worth seeing.
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Justin.TV – the Real ‘Truman Show’

Justin TV
This is just unbelievable, and I don’t know how long it will last, but there is a new Web site called Justin.TV which is about a guy, Justin, who is on TV all the time. :-) This is a serious flashback to The Truman Show, a film starring Jim Carey in which his entire life is broadcast on TV.

The only difference is that Justin is actually aware that he’s on film 24 hours a day because he’s the one filming himself.
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Spoof: Bush’s Special Announcement on Global Warming

George Bush ParodyWill Ferrell spoofs George W. Bush on a TBS special in support of StopGlobalWarming.org. As usual Will Ferrell had me laughing out loud a couple of times.

My favorite quote: “Global warming is an issue my administration is very concerned about. Deeply. Deeply, in a deep kind of concerned way. I start my day and I think about the warming of the globe, and how we can get it warmer.”
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Twingly the World’s Coolest Screen Saver

TwinglyMy buddy Hrafn over at Inkblot Earth found this incredibly cool screen saver called Twingly. In a nutshell it does the following things:

  • A visual representation shows blog postings from around the world in real time.
  • You can zoom in and out with your mouse’s scroll wheel, and you can rotate and spin the globe by clicking and dragging.
  • It’s possible to tell where the most articles are coming from because bars get taller as more posts come in from certain places.

Read on to see a video of it in action!
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Crazy Wedding Reception Dances

I’ve seen a lot of things in my life, but I’ve never seen a wedding reception like this!

Neat-o-rama shared two different videos taken at Wedding receptions which I can guarantee took a lot more rehearsal than just the simple rehearsal dinner.
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A Compendium of Office Pranks and Practical Jokes

Office PrankYesterday’s post about the Annoy-a-tron brought back fond memories from long ago when I worked in an office where people actually liked one another and we all used to pull practical jokes.

In fact, we were very competitive about our pranks, with each of us attempting to out do the other. Here now is a list of the top pranks from the ‘good old days’.
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