There seems to be some rumors going around about Chuck Norris and what he is, and isn’t capable of. These rumors seem to be perpetuated partially due to the fight scene I previously shared in which Bruce Lee kicks Chuck Norris’ Ass.

However, I assure you that was merely acting, and in order to clear this matter up I wanted to pass along the following list of facts:

• Children go to bed in Superman pajamas, but Superman goes to bed in Chuck Norris pajamas.
• Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
• Chuck Norris counted to infinity … Twice.
• Chuck Norris can speak Braille.
• Chuck Norris does not read books. He just stares them down until they give him the information he wants.
• Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through dry land.
• Chuck Norris doesn’t sleep, he waits.
• Chuck Norris doesn’t dodge bullets, bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
• There is no such thing as evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
• Chuck Norris is able to divide by zero.
• When Chuck Norris is entering a room he is not turning the lights on. He turns the darkness off.

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I kid you not when I tell you that MXC is one of my favorite TV shows of ALL TIME! Unfortunatly this show is not running on cable any more, but luckily I was able to feed my MXC addiction on the Internet. Thank you YouTube!

Most Extreme Elimination, later called MXC was a redubbing of the Japanese game show Takeshi’s Castle, which aired from 1986 to 1989. Absolutely the best part of this show was the new english dubbing which was full of insults, bathroom humor, and innuendo. There has never been anything like it, and never will be again, so you just have to watch an episode in order to understand what I’m talking about.
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Once again from the mind of Colby Jones, the truth about weather in Texas.

I’ve got no idea where this video came from, but our friend Colby Jones sent it over to me, so I had to share it with you all!

Basically here is a short tutorial for that redneck cousin you’ve got… you know the one… which will help him retrofit his 1973 AMC Pacer with power windows. All you’re going to need is a battery operated blender, and… well, you’ll see.
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I was in the Washington, D.C. area this weekend and while visiting a book store came across this Hummer sitting out in the parking lot. Thought I’d share the license plate with you guys…

I’m guessing that 8 year old twins Justin and Jared Serovitch must have been picked on a lot, because necessity is the mother of invention, and these kids invented the wedgie-proof underwear!

The good folks over at Fox News, being the quality journalists they are, did an interview with the twins to discuss the impetus for the creation of said underwear, and also to have the twins demonstrate the actual use.

Watch and learn…
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Mitch Hedberg was one of my favorite comedians. He had a really dry sense of humor and was absolutely brilliant when it came to one liners. For example:

I like escalators because an escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You’ll never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.

Both his jokes, and his delivery are unique and he cracked me up. Unfortunately he died in 2005 (of a drug overdose), so we won’t be getting any more of his comedic genius.

These two videos are from a special that was recorded for Comedy Central. I’m sure they are in violation of some sort of terms on YouTube, so don’t be surprised if they don’t stay up long. In the meantime, enjoy them while they are around!
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An anonymous reader sent me a link to this first video, and it was pretty funny. As usual I latched on to the theme and entertained myself for hours with silly videos of people wiping out on the dance floor. So I present for your amusement the best of the dancing mishap videos I came across. If anyone has more to add please drop a link in the comments.

Oh, and I didn’t put up videos where people actually got seriously injured or died. Yes, I came across at least 2 fatal dancing injuries. How’d you like to have that on your headstone?
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This cracked me up. You have to stay with it past the first two minutes. At first you are trying to figure out if this is serious, but once you get into it… well, you’ll see.

If you are very lucky, you might just get a call from Manoj this weekend around 11:30am. Whatever you do - don’t tell him you are in the middle of dinner!
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You guys know by now that I enjoy a good commercial. Well, my friend Karen S. sent me this one and it’s great. I don’t want to give a lot away before you give it a look, but the ingredients for this ad are:

• A totally hot Swedish chick
• A bathroom stall
• Cocaine
• … and a bowl full of disappointment

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Yippee! According to this video,

“Schools offering pole dancing classes are shooting up in cities all around the globe!”

Did you know it’s the only exercise form where you can wear stiletto heels?

Oh, and while you’re watching, keep an eye out for the “style and grace”. In fact, I’m sure all the guys will be thinking about is, “Wow. This women has style and grace.”
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This soap looks like it belongs in a thrasher film. Seriously, its one thing (as a play on words) to have “hand-shaped” soap, but these tiny baby hands look like they were just lopped off a fresh batch of infants.

They were created from molds based from dolls’ hands and the set will run you $16.