How to Speak Texan
Texans may tend to talk a little slow, but don’t let that fool you. The Texan culture relishes wit, wisdom and storytelling. And since I routinely communicate with folks all over the world I figured it would be appropriate to publish a little “Texan to English” translation guide to ensure people always know what I’m gettin on about.
So, in case you’d like to learn how to talk like a Texan, or if you just need to occasionally translate something you heard me say in passing, here is a lexicon of phrases and colloquialisms from Texas.
Definitions
- Aggravated – Used to describe everything from mild annoyance to dangerous, murderous rage.
- Conniption – A fit, getting all worked up over something. Example: That child was having a conniption! Someone needed to tan his hide.
- Looker – An attractive person. Example: “Wow! She’s a looker!”
- Over Yonder – Over there.
- Sorry – An adjective meaning worthless, loser, or useless. Enhanced inflection makes it more emphatic. Example: “When I get my hands on that sorry, good-for-nothing punk…”
- Grub – Food. A meal.
- Fixins – An entire meal, excluding the main dish. Example: “I’ll have a hamburger with all the fixins.”
- Directly – In a little while. Example: “Well run down to the ice cream store, directly. For now – finish your supper.”
- Idiot Box – Television
- Dinner – Often times refers to lunch, or the meal in the middle of the day. Sometimes may refer to the evening meal.
- Supper – Almost always refers to the evening meal, but sometimes may mean lunch.
- Howdy – Although it sounds like “how are you”, howdy is more of a salutation like hello, bonjour, guten Tag, etc.
- Fess up – To confess or admit to something.
- Fit to be Tied – very upset.
- Fixin’ to – Preparing to do something. Example: “I’m fixin to go to the store. Do you need anything?”
- Hissy Fit – Same as a conniption.
- Lit Out – Took off, started out, or absconded across some terrain. “He lit out of here as soon as the cops showed up.”
Phrases
- All Choked Up – Overcome with emotion (other than aggravation). A person is “all choked up” when they are deeply moved by sadness or by the thoughtfulness of others.
- All Worked Up – A state of aggravation, anxiety, or agitation. Example: “There is no need to get yourself all worked up over a little accident.”
- Come Hell or High Water – Determination to do something. Example: I’m going to catch that criminal come hell or high water!
- Tan Your Hide – To give someone a spanking or beating. Example: That child was having a conniption! Someone needed to tan his hide.
- One-legged Man at a Butt-kicking Contest – Not equipped for the task at hand.
- Long-tailed Cat in a Room Full of Rocking Chairs – Nervous.
- A Gnat in a Hail Storm – Not much chance at survival.
- Rode Hard and Put Up Wet – A tired individual who looks somewhat the worse for wear. Refers back to horses that were not taken care of well.
- Beat You Like a Rented Mule – Obviously you don’t want this to happen.
- Whole Nuther Thing – Something else entirely. Usually used to denote another story there isn’t time to relate. Example: I was down at the grocery store when I ran into my neighbor. He’s got this annoying dog, but that’s a whole nuther thing…”
- Plum Wore Out – Fatigued, exhausted; also sometimes used for “worn out” machinery, etc. Example: “After a long hard day I’m plum wore out.”
- All Hat and No Cattle – All show and no go… all talk and no action.
- This Ain’t My First Rodeo – I wasn’t born yesterday. I’ve been around a while. Experienced.
- If it was a snake it’d have jumped up and bit ya – An item “hidden” in plain sight.
- 6 of One, Half Dozen of the Other – Makes no difference. Six eggs is the same as a half dozen. It’s all the same to me.
If you aren’t the brightest bulb in the drawer you might get called:
- Dumber than dirt
- Dumb as a box of rocks
- Dumb as a box of hammers
- Not the sharpest tool in the shed
If you can’t be trusted you might be:
- Crooked as a dog’s hind leg
- Crooked as a barrel of snakes
If you’re attractive you might be:
- Cute as a possum.
Practice
Last night I was fixin some grub. It was gettin late and I was already plum wore out, but I had promised to grill up some steaks for supper so, come hell or high water, I was gonna get it done.
As I was preppin the meat I turned on the idiot box. It was playin’ some talk show and there was a woman having a conniption because her boyfriend was trying to get her to fess up that she was carrying some other man’s baby. This woman was fit to be tied and started tanning the boyfriend’s hide when the host stepped in and tried to tell her there was no need to get all worked up.
Well, that threw her into a real hissy fit and then they had about as much chance as a knat in a hailstorm of calming her down.
Directly, they brought out the results of one of those paternity tests and that woman looked as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. And with good reason because it turned out that baby belonged to some other guy.
At this point she got all choked up and the boyfriend was aggrivated and started threatening to beat her like a rented mule before he finally he lit out. By the time it was all over she looked like she’d been rode hard and put up wet.
Now if you ask me, it’s sad because she was cute as a possum but crooked as a dog’s hind leg. Anyway, the whole bunch of em were dumb as a box of hammers.
10 Texas Sayings
- There’s two theories to arguin’ with a woman. Neither one works.
- It’s so hot, the trees are bribing the dogs.
- Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier’n puttin’ it back in.
- If you’re ridin’ ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it’s still there.
- If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.
- Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
- If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin’.
- Don’t squat with your spurs on.
- It don’t take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep
- Always drink upstream from the herd.
- Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Ok. There’s always one more in Texas. :-) If you’ve got more, feel free to add them below!
Finally, you never have to ask a man if he’s from Texas. If he is, he’ll tell you on his own. If he ain’t, well, there’s no need to embarrass him.
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Originially from Philadelphia (the one in Pennsylvania not Mississippi) I was stationed at Fort Hood for 4 years starting in 1988 and ended up staying several places in Texas, Austin, Castroville, Hondo, and LaCoste. The last three in Medina County west of San Antone. I had to go back to Philly to care for aging and ailing parents. But I always remember “He’d complain if they hung him with a new rope” and “that dog don’t bark” and “I haven’t seen you in a coon’s age.”
Howdy,
I spent some times in Texas , Arlington , dallas and visited Alamo .
Texas is the only place accessed to my deep heart . It has a wonderfull sweet heart people . I like Texas style , culture and Maverick very very much .
Also I am trying to learn Texas accent .
Thanks for the info
I’m from west Texas and I do have a little bit of a twang in there. Well according to my girlfriend I have a big one, but shes from Mass…you know Pahk the cah in Havahd yahd? I keep telling her we took all the R’s from them.
I live in Beaumont now. Grew up in North Texas (Dallas, Denton, Shermon, Whitesboro, etc). Went to high school in the great city of Kountze (pop: 2100). The only thing I would add to your list is that Texans never use the “g” in “ing” it is always just “in.” Like, “I’m fixin to go the store, but I’m walkin insteada drivin so I can save some gas.”
Also, we do not use “ed” in discription. It is not barbed wire, powdered donut, or sweetened iced tea. It’s bobwyre, powderdonut, and Tea.
That’s so true, I’m from Texas i’m young and i grew up in the country. Everything i say or do is country and i got made fun about. I didn’t care much though. I spend the rest of my time takin care of my chickens and the rest of my farm and nobody would ever keep me from that! :) I’m from San Angelo
Im from Arlington like alot of you. And I like looking at what northerns think I talk like.
Honestly, I talk alot like everyone else in the USA. I say y’all but as a form of you all. It’s just more natural that way. Its not cause im stupid or undereducated. Piece of advice, never insult Texas to a Texan. We have a lot of pride and dont mind beatin ya. As we always say Dont Mess With Texas!! I’m from the metroplex of Texas, but my mom is from East Texas. I have heard a few of these sayings. My dad will still refer to a heavy rain as a turd floater, and my mom always calls lunch dinner. I say conniption all the time as well as aggravated, all worked up, worn out, dadgumit, doggoneit, darn, hold your horses, and a whole lot more. But the most sayings come from my great great grandmother, we called her Mubbie. I don’t really know why I did this I guess Ive just been wanting to.
I’m a Texas transplant in Oklahoma. I am so homesick now… These are the ones I recall:
–Give us a holler sometime.
–That boy’s ate up with a dumbass.
–Don’t be fibbin’
–You lie like a rug.
–and finally, if your “teet was caught in a wringer”, you were pretty mad.
*Don’t forget about the one and two finger waves you get while driving down old farm roads…
If you can decipher this, you’re on your way to speakin’ Texan.
1st feller: “C M ducks?”
2nd feller: “M R not ducks.”
1st feller: “O S A R. C M wings?”
2nd feller: “L I B! M R ducks.”
I understood it perfectly.
I’m from Texas myself, and I would like to point out one important thing about talking like a Texan. All Texans say git, not get ever. All across the state it’s git. Another addition is ya’ll come back. The phrase is used to mean you’re welcome to come back another time.
Also a few phrase shown that are said differently:
If it was a snake, it would’ve bit ya. (What you were looking for was close by or in plain sight.)
Six one way, half a dozen the other. (It’s the same either way. Often used in discussions about which way to go or what to do.)
Most of these phrases are said, though. There are only few I don’t recognize myself.
As a Texan transplanted to the UK, I have enjoyed reading these. I teach applied linguistics at the University of Oxford, and I say to my students, “Of course, British English is rather impoverished: it doesn’t have a second person plural (“y’all”); and it only has two terms for how close something is, unlike my dialect, which has three (“here”, “there” and, farther than “there”, “yonder”)”. It makes them think about language snobbery! (Note that I’m cheating just a bit, because there are some British dialects that have second person plurals like “youse”, but those aren’t usually as well developed as “y’all” – they don’t have possessive forms (“y’all’s car”), for example.
Anyway, thanks for this blog!
It is very true that North Texans talk differently than South Texans, because some of these sayings I’ve never heard. I’m city folk, from Arlington. No one in my area really says down yonder, that’s an old person thing. I think it’s funny how Northerners think Texans say ya’ll every two seconds. Andy, while searching on YouTube, I find that a lot of Brits think the term “jeet” is wierd, lol. What area of Texas are/were you in? Around here we say “didga eat?” Similar, but I’ve never heard that. Some of these sayings seem kind of old. But then again, I live in a pretty modernized area, living near Dallas and all, haha. It also helps that I’m a 1g Texan (mom from Maryland, dad from Oklahoma) so I say a lot of non-Texan things, idk, lol
Turning one syllable into more isn’t unique to Texas. Around Illinois and Indiana they pronounce “oil” as three syllables: aw-wee-yall.
Another of the sweet things my father used to do for us when we were children. You remember the child’s nursery rhyme, “This little piggy went to maket.” Daddy added another verse so that we could do have all 10 of our piggies. It went like this.
This little piggie said, “I want some roast beef.”
This little piggie said, “Where ya gonna git it?”
This little piggie said, “Grandpa’s barn.”
This little piggie said, “I go tell!”
This little piggie went “Wheeee, Wheee” all the way home.
dude we dont say “fixin’ to” we say “finna” lol
hello ” the man” im from texas( dallas fort worth area) and i don’t know if you know this but not all texans speak like that. i kind of hate when people think that we have a certain language cause we dont’. its just that some people talk a little bit different than other people in other areas. although i do use “fixin to” a lot. this is ” DA BOSS” signing off. peace out homey…..jk
Recently moved to Texas from Michigan. Have heard many, if not most, of these sayings before. One recently stumped me: “He lit a shuck”, alternately, “He’s fixin’ to light a shuck.” Translation: “He left”, or “He’s preparing to leave.” Completely befuddled and unable to translate into Midwestern English, I asked my father-in-law (native of Lampassas, TX) for help. Apparently, folks would light a dried corn husk (or shuck) when traveling home from another farm at night (before the days of flashlights, I guess). Charming people, these Texans.
Some of these crack me up because I say them all the time and never new it was a “Texas” thing. My favorite way to express being over joyed is how Larry TCG said it…
“I’m happier den Rosie Odonnel and a buffet of lil Debbie oatmeal cremes!!” haha
Many natural Texans will say “bobwyre” instead of barbed wire. Another one that is big in the Panhandle is “aiight” instead of alright. “Like wanna go eat?” “Aiight.” I used to hear my grandpa say “He’s only knee high to a grasshopper.” too meaning a short person or child.
thats like a gangster thing
A greeting I hear a lot in East Texas:
Jeet? (Did you eat yet?)
Regards,
Andy the Brit.
Katarus – sooo true that us North Texans speak different than South Texans.
My grandparents are from a town near Victoria in south TX, so some of these phrases I’ve heard Grampa say (usually as a joke) but I was raised in a Ft Worth suburb, so some of those are just plain silly.
Fixin to, yall, ustanot, and the generalization of Coke are definitely also NTXnisms. I also have said (and gotten made fun of here in Seattle for saying) “He’s got a lil hitch in his giddyup” (meaning he’s walking funny) as well as caddywompus and ‘ol’ (instead of the two-syllabled ‘oil’)
I’ve tried to explain the Texan accent to my Seattle-native husband, but he just ends up sounding like a bad Western movie. One-syllabled words are *subtle-y* made into two syllables: when. TX: ‘whi-un,’ And two-syllabled words are smooshed into one: Gas. TX: ‘ga-us.’
Loved reading about Texanisms
Pleased to meet y’all.
I wanted to add a bit to the lexicon.
I’ve always heard “hard row to hoe” in West Texas, and “commista” which I believe translates to “commenced to.”
Usage = She commista cryin’ when she heard he’d been in a wreck, because she had a hard enough row to hoe before he got hurt and the car tore up.
We had company show up unexpected, and I commista tryin’ to find something to fix for supper.
The alternator went out, and we commista pushin’ the car towards home in the dark.
“In a wreck” isn’t just confined to auto / vehicle accidents. It covers getting thrown off a horse or being in a bad situation generally (also known as getting or having gotten “in a tight”). The oil business in the late 1980s in general got in a tight, and then the stock market crash of ’87 put the whole outfit in a wreck.
“Tough row to hoe” refers to a difficult task, as in “fixin the economy will be a tough row to hoe.” The phrase refers to removing the weeds from a row of growing commercial crop (cotton in my experience) with a hoe. Obviously some rows contained more weeds or were especially long. As a city boy visiting my agrarian cousins I thought it was fun and I got a nickel a row for my efforts! Misused as “tough road to hoe” by some yankees.
I agree with this guy, and another example would be one of ur translations: over yonder, thats old english from england, so yeah u should look some of them up before calling them texan, Im not saying this to piss you off, but just to state a fact that would be a shame if it was over looked, good idea of making a translation though hahahaha
Ok some words you did get……See in North Texas we speak a little different from south Texans. But the most common words are FIXIN TO and YALL so to those Texas out there be proud of our Texan Slaging.
I’ll see you in the mornin’ if the Lord is willin’ and the creek don’t rise (with divine blessing and if the bridge doesn’t wash out).
Whippin’ a dead horse (pointless task)
Barking up the wrong tree (hunting reference)
there’s a hitch in yer gt along
1. Pull up yer britches. (pants)
2. I’ll see you in the mornin’ if the Lord is willin’and the creek don’t rise.
3. Even a blind pig’ll find an acorn every once in a while! (anyone can get lucky) -also- Even a broke clock is right twice a day.
4. That dog won’t hunt! (unacceptable)
5. Titty baby (spoiled, coddled, or acting immature)
6. Who goes thar? Friend or Foe? (addressing an uninvited visitor)
7. Reach in the icebox and brang me a Coke. -What kind dýa want? -Red {fruit punch, strawberry, cherry, etc. fizzy beverage}.
(Using colors to indicate flavor also works with kool-aid). ie) Momma said what kinda Kool-Aid dya want with supper? -Red
I’ve noticed on King Of The Hill that they say “hwat” instead of “what”. Like “i tell you hwat, man”
My dad and granddad (papaw, of course) both do that. We are from West Texas (Colorado City), and lots of the older men do that with words that begin with “Wh,” like “hwhite” for “white,” “hwen” for “when,” etc
Great article. As a native Texan (especially from the “rough neck area” ) We happen to say a few things here that you’ve missed.
Catty Whompused- not aligned or straight.
Whomperjawed- when something is not fitting properly
Shoot- an explicative (used to replaced curse words)
I-don-cur (but said fast)- “I don’t care”
Eat up- used as a comeback to a stupid statement or situation (i.e. “Where did I put my keys?” “Where you usually leave your keys” “Oh.” “Eat up”
Hissy Fit- another term for a temper tantrum.
Enjoy and Happy Trails :]
You seem to be missing: getaround2it – meaning that you will take care of something at some other time. “I’ll be gettin’ a new pair o’ boots soon a I ken getaround2it.”
Texans also can take a one letter word and make it multisylabic, Ex: I pronounced Awh-ah
That and I heard a variation on the “sharp as a bowling ball”, “sharp as a marble.”
And finally “happier than a pig in s**t” meaning very pleased or overjoyed.
and I thought Austrians speak weird german.
talking about Austrians, did you know that in Anries first movies his voice was overdubbed by someone who can speak german, as nobody understood his Austrian slang???
funny what a carrier you can make out of that
usta, this is actually 3 words put together with very bag grammar
usta, pronounced: used-to
syn: I once
ant: I never
I usta not blog much, but this is fun!
someggs, pronounced: sm-eggs
What did the Texan have for breakfast? I had someggs.
There’s one I use and I am a tru blu texas…been here all my life….it is..”gonna whoop you like a red headed step child”..meaning a real good whoopin
Doyle says back in Texas…they used to say….if you want to gamble, let’s go outside and pull up weeds and see who has the longest root.
Sloan is right about the “pull up a weed” – terminology. Doyle explained it in season 3 episode 3 of HSP (High Stakes Poker) :-)
Bill,
Thanks so much for that explanation! It only took half a year to find someone who actually knew what Doyle meant! :-)
John P.
I watched the same episode of High Stakes Poker where Doyle makes that comment. Later on, Gabe Kaplan comes out of the announcer’s booth and joins the game. He asks Doyle what he meant by that. You had to pay attention because the announcers were talking over them, but Doyle said that “I’m about fit to pull up a weed” means that I am not catching any cards and I am getting ready to gamble. It means he’s gonna make a bluff or a play at a pot because he’s frustrated by the lack of cards he’s gotten.
Hope that helps-
Bill
Dennis,
Yes, that is certainly possible too. He could be referring to chewing tobacco such as the kind you get in a Red Man pouch. I hadn’t thought of that until you mentioned it…
Of course, I’m not sure what would have prevented him from doing that during the game if he wanted to. In a casino you can smoke, so why not chew?
John
John,
Great website!! Doyle Brunson’s comment “I’m about ready to pull up a weed” got me curious enough to search the web. That’s how I found you.
Could he be referring to the practice of pulling up a long stem weed to chew on when stopping to relax? He left the poker game a few hands after he said this.
Dennis
Chris I must say that is a new one for me. Doyle is from an older generation so I’m not surprised he would have some unique sayings like that. If I had to guess at the meaning these three possible interpretations come to the top of my mind:
I’m pretty sure I could give a better interpretation if I actually witnessed the context of the comment, but it’s a little hard to say right now.
John
I heard Doyle Brunson say something like, “I’m fit to pull up a weed.” Have you ever heard that one before? Apparently it means that someone is tired, but I dont get it…
Bob, you are totally right! I missed those!
And thanks for the kind words. :-)
John
Lots of familiar stuff, John, to someone who grew up between Abilene and San Angelo and is married to someone from Houston. Two phrases I think of as Texanisms that I didn’t see, though, are “haddn oughta” and “big ‘ole,” as in “That dog haddn ought peed on that big ole tree.”
Don’t you like the fact that Aussies use “reckon” so often? I thought that was Texan, but I guess not.
Beautiful web site, by the way.
— Brisbane Bob
http://www.twotexansdownunder.com
My wife speaks fluent Texan as that is her native country and I have learned (lernt?) many of these foreign phrases over the years. Early in our marriage she often had to break it down for me. For example, when asked if we wanted to enter a family members home we were told ya-kan-awl-kumin. After seeing my blank look she repeated herself several times. On the 4th try I finally understood it to mean “Y’all can all come in”. Needless to say we “mosied on in”.
In Utah, one of my teachers in Jr. High liked to say, “if your brains were gas, you wouldn’t have enough to run a go-cart around a cheerio.”
My dad, whenever he had to do something that he did not want the family to know about, like buying Christmas presents, would always say he had to go see a man about a horse. We would change it up and say he had to go see a horse about a man.
“If brains were gasoline you couldn’t fill an ant’s gas tank to run around a BB”. Thanks for the advice, Dad.
That’s pretty funny Peter. :-)
GS – I’ve never heard that one, but it’s a good one too!
I’m from North Carolina (some people call it little Texas) and I definitely know all those sayings. One of my personal favorites is referring to someone as being “sharp as a bowling ball”
John, I’m married to a Texan (Corsicana, would you believe?) and I lived in Dallas for nearly 7 years. I have to say I’ve heard quite a few of those sayings but…there’s a few there that aren’t even remotely Texan in origin.
Australians call the TV the idiot box too. In fact, I’ve never heard the TV referred to as that outside of Australia. It was “TV” or the “tube” while I was in the US.
Six to one, half-dozen in the other predates Texas, and probably the US altogether, same with come hell or high water (which has its origin in Biblical allusion). Both are old English sayings – and they’re used over here too.
If it was a snake, it would’ve bit you is used here too – pretty fitting when you realise Australia has 18 of the world’s top 20 venomous snakes. :)
But, my wife, even after three years here in Australia, still says she’s “fixin’ to” do something, and she uses aggravated in the sense you’ve described.
So, I reckon you’re pretty much on the mark.